Every new moment brings new changes with itself. It also depends how much you need this and take advantage of. New things were invented time by time. In my opinion, every century carry vast amount of changes to our lives. In every new age we are witnesses of improvements, almost in technology, medicine and several things that make our lives much easier.
Firstly, I want to bring up the subject with my thoughts about the technology. I am always interested in news and new inventions. I saw inventions such as, flying cars and transparent planes. I also have seen future computers, which will be produced in a few years. It can be used in all places, and will be necessary for everyone. I want to talk about the computers as well, which were produced a few years ago. We could not use computers in our native language, in fact, people who does not know foreign languages could not benefit from them. However, genius persons made it useful for all. They also have made new cell phones, which substitute computers and televisions. Scientists are planning on creating new amusing devices.
The second most improving field is medicine. I think, as in ancient times, new drugs and medicines will be produced. We wish they will be able to find out outlets for the most incurable illnesses. The number of patients will be decreased. All are looking forward of building up new modern hospitals, with much more comfortable wards and well-educated doctors, moreover modern improved devices. New inventions, which refer to the first years of the century, are adequate. Nano technology, 3D, 5D appliances and other creations are involved in this.
Finally, I want to clarify the issues, which make life much easier for us. Less human labor, much more incomes are the most spread expectancies. Gradually, life becomes easier for us. Improved technologies are the main reason of it. They should originate new work places. The quantity of unemployed persons will descend. Life conditions will become peaceful to live.
Thus, no one needs stable lifestyle. Sometimes it takes to spontaneous changes. Furthermore, many useful inventions were created in unintended circumstances. What we do are for our favor. We should not evade innovations.
Hei Aysel! :D
Your essay structure is flawless and you definitely have thought of some strong points to make your argument. However, there are some mistakes that you should try to correct.
I noticed quite a few times throughout your essay that you start introducing an argument uncertain of a fact and then continue in a very confident tone. Here an example:
We wish they will be able to find out outlets for the most incurable diseases. The number of patients will decrease.
When you "wish", you do not know the outcome of future events. That's why you shouldn't boldly state that patients will get better. You can only hope they will get better.
The second most improving field is medicine. I think that, as in ancient times, new drugs and medicines will be produced.
Again here, but now you start off very confidently and then you go soft. If you know that the second most improving field medicine is, then mention perhaps a revolutionary drug that has been discovered.
What I am trying to say is: rethink your paragraphs! Start off with a fact that backs you up. This will also help you work on coherency.
It isn't incorrect to use words like "things" or "stuff", but they are not particularly good looking in an essay. Try to replace those words with more concrete nouns or subordinate clauses.
Good luck! :D
