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The methods used by three countries in order to deal with harmful waste products

Sep 13, 2017   #1

dealing with chemicals

The pie charts below show how dangerous waste products are dealt with in three countries.

The charts illustrate the methods used by three countries (Republic of Korea, Sweden, the UK), in order to deal with harmful waste products.

Overall, it is observed that hazardous waste products in Sweden and the UK are mostly buried underground, as opposed to the Korean Republic, where the majority of them are recycled.

In detail, underground burial of dangerous waste products accounts for 82% in the UK and 55% in Sweden. With regards to alternate ways, 25% of Sweden's harmful waste products are recycled, while the rest 20% is destroyed by fire. As for the UK, 8% of its hazardous waste products are either thrown into the sea or treated with chemical methods, whilst a mere 2% goes through incineration.

Turning to the Republic of Korea, more than half of its harmful waste products are recycled, whilst 22% of them are buried in the surface. Additionally, a smaller portion of 9% is burnt in flames.

Holt [Contributor] 1543  
Sep 13, 2017   #2
Melinda, the opening summary that you wrote is tremendously incomplete and improperly formatted. Since this is an academic report that you are presenting, you must never present any information in a parenthesis. All of the information contained in the chart are of the utmost importance to the reader and should not be relegated to a parenthesis because that indicates "optional" information. In these types of essays, no information is optional. Therefore, all the information must be presented in complete sentences within fully developed paragraphs.

In the overview paragraph, make sure that you clearly outline the report information that you will be covering in the 3 body paragraphs. That means, indicating the 3 countries and the types of hazardous waste disposal procedures that will be discussed.Then indicate the trending discussion. Meaning, which is the most often used procedure that is common to all 3 countries? That is the trend.

Then divide the essay into paragraphs. Do a comparison by percentage of each portion of the pie chart. By each part, I mean each common procedure between the 3. Then in the end, Focus on the difference between the UK and the other 2 countries since the UK seems to have more waste disposal procedures in place than the other 2. That is the end of the essay.

Your essay shows some analysis and focus, but not enough to prove that a thorough analysis and presentation of information was done in the report. Therefore, there are still a number of problem points in terms of your ability to analyze the essay. Once you learn to do a more thorough analysis of the images, your writing and your score should improve. I hope to see those changes occur with each essay that you write.
hgianghgiang 3  
Sep 20, 2017   #3
Your essay merely report the statistic provided in the charts, without analyzing it.
Here's my suggestion:
- compare between Sweden and Korea since the two countries conduct the same methods of waste treatment. However, the statistics greatly differ.
- include that the UK has a more diverse system of waste treatment.
LadyOfClockwork 20  
Oct 5, 2017   #4
Hi, I'd like to rewrite a sentence for you.

In detail, underground burial ...
=> 82% of waste products end up in landfills in the UK, compared with 55% in Sweden.

Just try a different expression. :)

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