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IELTS WRITING TASK 2: Should mobile phone is banned like smoking


chantran 4 / 9  
Oct 7, 2021   #1

Topic: The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking.


Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extent?

Some people believe that using mobile phones is equally harmful to society as smoking and it is, therefore, also expected to be banned. From my perspective, I am in complete disagreement with this opinion as now will be discussed.

Firstly, it is prejudiced that people compare the use of mobile phones equivalently antisocial as smoking. Since phone and tobacco are two distinctively different entities, which exist for different purposes, the comparison between them is unreasonable. Tobacco has long been proving to be detrimental to not only the smoker themselves but also the health of society at large. The use of mobile phones, admittedly, has some drawbacks, but it does not dangerous or threatens the life of anybody. For example, some critics might point out that the excessive use of smartphones is attributable to myopia, or the noise of cell phones might be an annoyance to the surrounding people. These problems, however, can be easily curbed by limiting the time on screen, or turning on the silent mode when in public areas.

Secondly, while it makes sense why tobacco should be prohibited for its deadly effect, phones have numerous benefits to our life. Ever since the introduction of mobile phones, it has revolutionized the way we communicate and how we live to the point that everybody needs a phone to work or study today. Most jobs require employees to be either available by phone, for example, doctors and police officers, or to use their phones throughout the day, as is common with businessmen and lawyers. Mobile phones even become more necessary in times of pandemic such as the Covid-19 when everybody is required to work and study from home.

In conclusion, I content that mobile phones, unlike tobacco, have insignificant drawbacks to our society. In contrast, its enormous benefits make the idea of banning phones sounds far-fetched.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 11,749 3795  
Oct 9, 2021   #2
as now will be discussed

Provide your discussion statement for a proper opinion statement response. The topics that you will use as reasons will allow you to create a more comprehensive summarized response.

prejudiced

Improper word usage. Prejudice refers to unreasonable feelings, opinions, or attitudes, especially of a hostile nature, regarding an ethnic, racial, social, or religious group.. There cannot be any prejudice among material things. There can however, be bias as in " I am bias towards the IPhone." Regardless.the sentence implication /meaning is incorrect.

I content

Word usage error once again. Content refers to the subjects or topics covered in a book or document. The word you are looking for is " contend" which means, " to assert or maintain earnestly" .

Work on your vocabulary. Do not use words without knowing if it applies to your writing. Use a dictionary for meaning clarification first.
OP chantran 4 / 9  
Oct 9, 2021   #3
@Holt
Thank you so much, your advice is of great help to me.


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