Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


The modern parents almost don't take their free-time to enjoy their children's companies


Ngocnguyen777 2 / 3  
Jul 26, 2020   #1

Families Today parents spend little free time with their children. Why is it the case?



There is a growing concern revolving around the tendency which modern parents almost don't take their free-time to enjoy their children's companies whether they like or not. This can lead to significant influences on young children development due to numerous reasons that this essay will discuss below.

For a start, There is no doubt that adults currently have to deal with a load of work at their occupational office. Thus, being always on the go, keeping trace with promotion, They try to release tensions, hide from hustle and bustle life by enjoying their own free time. Added to this, Children, especially the ones in young ages, may be the primary cause of frustrating agency to their private space.
hoangtotk6 1 / 2  
Jul 26, 2020   #2
You do not really present a convincing argumentative essay in this case. You are solely focused on defending your opinion rather than comparing the arguments / reasons coming from both sides. I would not call this a convincing argumentative essay because it lacks a discussion of alternating reasons. In an argumentative essay, you should be able to convince the reader to believe your side through the use of a balanced discussion and presentation of supporting reasons or evidence. That is not completely seen in this essay due to the improper format of your presentation.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4771  
Jul 27, 2020   #3
This prompt is used for an English language test. Specifically, it is used in as an old prompt in the IELTS Task 2 essay. As such, the essay should have been presented using a minimum 250 word format. You have 118 words in this essay. That word count will result in enough percentage deduction points based on the missing word count to cause an automatic failing score for this essay. You must strive to write more words, at least 250, if you want to have a chance of even getting a simple passing mark in this test. You need to write:

Par. 1: Prompt paraphrase + response
Par. 2: Reason 1 with explanation
Par. 3: Reason 2 with explanation
Par. 4: concluding summary

That is the format by which the standard task 2 essay is presented by the writer. Remember to use enough examples to support your explanation so that the paragraphs will be fully developed in terms of reasoning and substance.


Home / Writing Feedback / The modern parents almost don't take their free-time to enjoy their children's companies
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳