Modern societies need specialist in certain fields, but not in others.Some people think therefore that governments should pay university fees for some stundents who study subjects that are needed by society.Those who choose to study less relevant subjects should not receive government funding.Would the advantages of such an educational policy outweight the disadvantages?
Many students go to universiry nowadays because they want to have a degree, to make a career.Some of them have to go to university because they need a qualification and advanced studies to get a better job.A university offers a wide range of subjects and also different fees for each course.
Modern societies need specialists in any field because without somebody who can explain and give the work form genereation to generation.Without this kind of persons, that field would be dead because there are no workers nor any progress.If governemnts paid university fees only for students who choose to study subjects like: chemistry, engineering, physical science or other, many students would be disaadvantaged.Some of them would choose a course which is paid eventhough they don not have the abilities required.A thing like this would involve more disadvantages than advantages because it would eucourage people to choose only certain courses.
We should understand that this world needs something from every field, to go on, to make a whole.For example, how can a house with a wonderful constuction be complete if there is not an artist,a painter to give that house colour.Governments schould come up with a solution that encourages every stundent to reach performance, to go beyond his limits, to be the best.
To sum up, a modern society can bring opportunities to everyone, to fulfill their dreams, so governments schould think twice before making a decision about universities funding because this is a serious problm,especially for students who have to borrow money form banks.
What do you think about my essay? Please let me know your opinion and what band score do you think I can get with this essay.Thank you!
Hi,
In the intro, you need to write a motivator, then paraphrase the topic, and state your opinion (whether or not the advantages of the policy outweigh its disadvantages). Don't beat about the bush.
For each body paragraph, write a topic sentence for your main idea before explaining it further.
As for the conclusion, again paraphrase the topic and state your opinion.
Also, I think some of your expressions aren't very academic. For example: 'A
thing like this', 'this world needs something from', 'so governments schould think twice'. And don't make spelling mistakes: schould, problm, form.
Best
