Mom and Dad should be the teacher for social life of their children. Other people think that school should be responsible to give related subject about that. Meanwhile, the children have lived with their parent since they were born in this universe. It makes me to believe that the parent is the first and the best teacher for them. Even thought, they get counselling subject in their school. This essay will discuss about this notion.
First of all, the most of first children knowledge have come from their life hood owing to the fact that they grew up in this site, and the first people who though them were their mother and father. Currently they gave the biggest influence about their children knowledge especially in social life. For example, the new born baby do not know all of thing in the world, and their parent teach them how to eat, drink, and communicate with other people. So, being good or bad child in social life is depend on how their parent teach them.
On the other hand, school has provided counselling subject. Furthermore, the students always practice this subject in in the school to make conversation with their peers. Nerveless, just counselling lesson is not enough for making student to become good people due to the fact that the teacher just give this lesson almost one time in a week, and they are not able to respect for all of the student. So, this subject is not effective to make a student being good in social life.
Overall, it can be seen that parent is the best teacher for children about their social life. Whereas the school give lesson about that, just lesson from school is not enough to make children being good people in life hood.
Mom and Dad should be a teacher for social life of their children.
(be careful with the and a (a use for singular noun countable)
2. ... their children knowledge especially in social life ..
It should be children's knowledge ---> the knowledge that belong to children
3. ... practice this subject in in theat school to make ...
there are two preposition respectively in one sentence ---> in in, just delete one of them or change into 'at'
Thank you
Hello Pramudia, here my suggestion for you :)
t makes me to believe that the parent is ...
people who though[Though? may be you mean taught >> from teach] them were their ...
... influence about theirchildren knowledge[children's knowledge]
... new born baby do not[does not] know all of thing in the world
... child in social life is depend on how their parent teach them
Nerveless[Nevertheless] just counselling lesson ...
NOTICE; typo, because different words, different meaning
Keep practicing and GLUCK :)
helloo...
First of all, the most of first children knowledgeknowledge's children have come from ...
... first people who thoughtaught them were their ...
... For example, the new born babybabies do not know all of thing ...
Hello Pram!
Allow me to give you some suggestion.
1. Mom and Dad
(informal use, better if: mother and father)
2. should be the teacher for... Other people think that school should be
(too repetitive)
3. responsible to give related subject about that.
4. It makes me to believe that the parent ...
5. This essay will discuss aboutthis notion.
(Youu have to discuss both discussion)
I hope it can help you :)
INTRODUCTION
overall, this is a good introduction. You successfully delivered your introductory paragraph with strong opinion related to the issue. However, this is to long while you tend to make simple sentences. Just bear in mind to always make a strong, brief, and effective introduction that consist by ideally 2 to 3 paragraphs. all the important details should be presented in body paragraph. Good job
BODY PARAGRAPH
Body 1:your idea is adequate but need to develop more. you should emphasize what kinds or moral/social value children get from parents and then why it is good for them to get it from their parents.
body 2:
is counselling subject is only a matter of peer conversation??? your idea is quite confusing here added by poor developed supporting details.You should emphasize what is counseling subject, what sorts of knowledge student can get from it, and why it is not sufficient for children social value learning
CONCLUSION
just simply restate your opinion here after paraphrase your main ideas in body paragraphs.
