But does it look good in structure and idea ?
Simply write two body paragraphs as to answer the tasks;
Body 1:
How much is this style of management effective?
Body 2:
Are there any better ways of encouraging employees to work hard?
If you look at the two tasks more closely, then you will see these key words:
style of management effective and ways to work hard should be taken in account.
If you answer these tasks fully, then you will earn a good score for you meet certain criteria: Task responses. However, have look at these:
1.
improve their quality of life.
What do you mean by "quality of life" here? That sounds too vague.
2.
makes that one feeling honor, but also set a motivation on the others and makes their relation closer.
Are you sure this point is designed to be in conjunction with the task? Please check it.
For example,
For instance,
I always suggest others to present specific examples. This can be started by asking journalistic questions: how many? who? when? what? results? By this, you will have a lot of relevant details that support each topic sentence. Interesting, huh?