Unanswered [10] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


Multi cultural societies - IELTS Writing Task 2 - Agree or Disagree?


ainirere /  
Dec 11, 2015   #1
Multi cultural societies, which are a mixture of different ethnic groups, bring more benefits than drawbacks for a country. (Agree/Disagree)

The mixture of ethnic groups in a country will bring the advantages outweigh to the disadvantages. I personally agree to this view that multi cultural societies have less drawbacks implicating in a state.

First of all, I believe that culture could be a prominent asset within country. Every culture possessed by each country have an own uniqueness value. For instance, Indonesia is popular with its traditional dress namely batik. The sale of batik in other states by Indonesian will invite foreigner to wear it, where batik become more noteworthy globally. Owing to this, the culture of Indonesia will be more preserved to the next generation. Hence, the prevailing of other cultures in a state could prevent the extinction of culture itself.

A further reason that could be considered of this view is, people could learn much culture from many group ethnic in their country, such as in gastronomic sense. Many entrepreneurs come from various nation open restaurant business selling their original beverages of their state in other country. Thereby people could taste palatable foods from around the world in their own country. Besides, the indigenous people could learn through how to cook their cuisine and vice versa. Regarding to this, worthy each other and being hospitable person is paramount to have a good relation between them.

In brief, cultural diversity in a state carries more benefits, particularly to expand the knowledge about cultures from another country. However, the indigenous people and the foreigners should respect each other to maintain a good relation.
pikul 23 / 26 3  
Dec 13, 2015   #2
... where batik becomeS more noteworthy globally.

... culture from many groupS ethnic in their country

... open restaurant business BY selling their original beverages ...
OP ainirere /  
Dec 18, 2015   #3
Hi all, thank you for giving me feedback :)


Home / Writing Feedback / Multi cultural societies - IELTS Writing Task 2 - Agree or Disagree?
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳