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IELTS: Music has come to human kind as a valuable gift that is necessary for a better life


vmtct 6 / 7  
Aug 18, 2014   #1
There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays ?

From the ancient time, music has emerged in human life. Today, the melody of strings, a grand piano notes or golden-like saxophones sound can be heard almost everywhere. With the advance of technology, music has come to everybody at ease and has been an unalienable part of our life.

Life without the melody of sound would be robotic. People listen to music for many purposes and in many cases. A ballad is like a friend who relieves people souls when they are sad; when people are happy, a funky song can even bring them more excitements. Some of Mozart's sonatas are scientifically proved to elevate one' intelligence. As such, music is so magical that it can color our lives and make them more meaningful to enjoy.

Although nowadays-international music has been wide-spread all over the world, I believe that folk songs traditionally from a country is more important and invaluable. Traditional music tightly attach to a nation, to its culture, its people and its history. Farmers love to sing local songs of which the lyric tells how their work is. A mother sweetly sings her baby to sleep with a traditional lullaby. These melodies are the heritage of a country that must be preserved through time, especially when the so-called market music is so enjoyed by the teenagers.

To conclude, music has come to human kind as a valuable gift that is necessary for a better life. On top of that, cultural melody is a national identity that distinguishes one country to the others in such flat world nowadays.

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It's been long time since I last write an essay. Your supports would be valuable to me

Pyon9x 11 / 24 9  
Aug 19, 2014   #2
i think your essay is good, it is easy to read and well structured. just a few points that i want to discuss with you about

Traditional music tightly attaches to a nation, to its culture, its people and its history.
this sentence is alright
if i were you, i would rewrite it this way
Traditional music, by contrast, expresses the culture, customs and history of a country

btw, i think this idea should be more clarified in the body
cultural melody is a national identity that distinguishes one country to the others in such flat world nowadays.
fikri 5 / 317 71  
Aug 19, 2014   #3
Some of Mozart's sonatas

you put this as a specific example in the first body, but I cannot find specif examples in the second body,,try to make it balance by putting the same thing in the second one


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