Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 6


'Music is a great way of communication' - my essay


hakan 1 / 1  
Apr 26, 2012   #1
There are many different types of music in the world today.why do we need music?ıs the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays

Music is a great way of communication and people all over the world listen to the music of other nations ,which I will mention bellow two options.

The first is that music is one of the best way to relax after stressful. People have the opprotunity to relax leave their troubles and worries behind and have fun .Secondly music often helps people to cheer up. Personally when something is bothering me I prefer listen to some of my favorite traditional songs..I am sure that many people will agree with me on this issue because it helps me to feel better about everything leave my troubles behind and enjoy life.

A further point is that music plays an integral role in the life of world. It is used for such as ceremonial purposes, recreation, expression, and healing. Many people gathered on the ceremonies and listened to traditional music.This ceremonies helps people to find out more about each other communicate and meet new people.in our modern stressful would we often forget about our customs and traditions.However I think that people should keep their traditions because they help to remember our forefathers and value the beautiful moments we have in our time.

On the other hand the traditional of music brings to gather a community of dedicated, experienced.People used to invoke spirits, for example ask for rain or healing,or are used to heal the sick in most cases.This is why music the traditional music plays essential role in different ceremonies.For example I think it is rather to imagine a wedding solemn music or the olympic games without anthems since many people prefer to listen to traditional music.Also it helps people to slow down their life pace and enjoy the present moments that are irreplaceable and beautiful.

In conclusion I think music is the uniqe language which is understood by everyone all over the planet.
OP hakan 1 / 1  
Apr 26, 2012   #2
There are many different types of music in the world today.why do we need music?ıs the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays

Music is a great way of communication and people all over the world listen to the music of other nations ,which I will mention bellow two options.

The first is that music is one of the best way to relax after stressful. People have the opprotunity to relax leave their troubles and worries behind and have fun .Secondly music often helps people to cheer up. Personally when something is bothering me I prefer listen to some of my favorite traditional songs..I am sure that many people will agree with me on this issue because it helps me to feel better about everything leave my troubles behind and enjoy life.

A further point is that music plays an integral role in the life of world. It is used for such as ceremonial purposes, recreation, expression, and healing. Many people gathered on the ceremonies and listened to traditional music.This ceremonies helps people to find out more about each other communicate and meet new people.in our modern stressful would we often forget about our customs and traditions.However I think that people should keep their traditions because they help to remember our forefathers and value the beautiful moments we have in our time.

On the other hand the traditional of music brings to gather a community of dedicated, experienced.People used to invoke spirits, for example ask for rain or healing,or are used to heal the sick in most cases.This is why music the traditional music plays essential role in different ceremonies.For example I think it is rather to imagine a wedding solemn music or the olympic games without anthems since many people prefer to listen to traditional music.Also it helps people to slow down their life pace and enjoy the present moments that are irreplaceable and beautiful.

In conclusion I think music is the uniqe language which is understood by everyone all over the planet.
frank1992 3 / 5  
Apr 27, 2012   #3
hakan
The first is that music is one of the best way to relax after stressful (...AFTER THE STRESS)

.I am sure that many people will agree with me on this issue because it helps me to feel better about everything leave my troubles behind and enjoy life. ( Too general idea about your feelings: not all people can know what you like except your friends, relatives, family members,etc Repetition of the same words: leave my troubles behind and enjoy life)

Many people gathered on the ceremonies and listened to traditional music. (Better to use Present Simple, because people still enjoy music, but not enjoyed it only in the past)

Take care of grammar. Hope my revisions have been helpful.
I liked the ideas, but the correction is necessary to reach the perfection

Good luck
ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 672 148  
Apr 27, 2012   #4
Hi, I have some ideas about the topic, I hope these hints be helpful

Why music is important: 1) These days music is a way for teaching. for example, it is used for improving the vocabulary of English learners. In fact the rhythm helps the learners to memorize various intricate words more easily.

2) Music is a part of art. Therefore. artistic aspects of the music is also important.
3) Music of a specific part of the world can introduce the cultural and social values of that area, because music of each country stems from the history, and culture of that country.

4) Music has several positive effects on people's mental states.
Which one is more important : traditional music or international ones: This depends on the people's attitudes toward music. Some believe that traditional musics are a part of their cultural identity and should maintained. In the view of these people traditional music and folk musics are more important than the international ones. Some other, however, think that the modern musics are more popular and must be paid more attention. In fact, the majority of these individuals are young adults and this can be a reason why they think in this way. The second reason is attributed to the effects that the international musics can have on the financial circumstances of a society. The high popularity of these types of music such as Rock, Rap, Pop, and the like, may cause many people spend their money on them and this can provide a good opportunity for development of different music companies. This phenomenon not only can increase the job opportunities in a country, but also it may improve the economy of the county.

Finally, you can compare the advantages of traditional and international musics to show which one is more imperative.
Regards
A. Zafari
Jeecee 5 / 19  
Apr 27, 2012   #5
That's how I will write it. Hopefully someone can correct my mistakes too !

There are many different types of music in the world today.why do we need music?ıs the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays

There are many different types of music in today's world. Is traditional folks music more important than foreign languages pop music?

Music is a great way of communication and people all over the world listen to the music of other nations ,which I will mention bellow two options.

The first is that music is one of the best way to relax after stressful. People have the opprotunity to relax leave their troubles and worries behind and have fun .Secondly music often helps people to cheer up. Personally when something is bothering me I prefer listen to some of my favorite traditional songs..I am sure that many people will agree with me on this issue because it helps me to feel better about everything leave my troubles behind and enjoy life.

I believe music helps to bring people together from different part of the world. Besides,music helps to relax after a stressful day and it cheer up people. Personally, when I have a bad day I listen to my faviour traditionl music and it make me feel good. I think many people will agree with my opinions.

A further point is that music plays an integral role in the life of world. It is used for such as ceremonial purposes, recreation, expression, and healing. Many people gathered on the ceremonies and listened to traditional music.This ceremonies helps people to find out more about each other communicate and meet new people.in our modern stressful would we often forget about our customs and traditions.However I think that people should keep their traditions because they help to remember our forefathers and value the beautiful moments we have in our time.

Music have many purposes in the world. It use in ceremonial, recration, praying, healing ,and many more. In fact music is a form of communication it unite the world together. However, traditional folks music are importnat in our cultures and traditions.

On the other hand the traditional of music brings to gather a community of dedicated, experienced.People used to invoke spirits, for example ask for rain or healing,or are used to heal the sick in most cases.This is why music the traditional music plays essential role in different ceremonies.For example I think it is rather to imagine a wedding solemn music or the olympic games without anthems since many people prefer to listen to traditional music.Also it helps people to slow down their life pace and enjoy the present moments that are irreplaceable and beautiful.

In many countries people using music in religion gathering, healing, chatting, and praying for rain. I cannot imagine how the world will be without music, such as during wedding, sport events, and the national anthems. Music is so beautiful, it helps us to relax and forget all our problems.

In conclusion I think music is the uniqe language which is understood by everyone all over the planet.

Music is a international language. We need it to help to bring us all together in peace.
loandinh 4 / 4  
Apr 27, 2012   #6
Music is a great way of communication and people all over the world listen to the music of other nations ,which I will mention bellow two options. => in my opinion, there is a problem here. You said: " which I will mention bellow two options", so what are your options? You should state these two options. => Music is a great way of communication and people all over the world listen to music not only of their nations but also of other ones. So why is music so popular? The reason is the relaxation and cheer that music brings in.

One more point, in your essay you didn't focus on the topic, which is about comparing traditional and international music. i just see that you wrote some advantages of traditional music.

regards,


Home / Writing Feedback / 'Music is a great way of communication' - my essay
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳