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TOEFL: Next 20 years - transportation goes ahead and novel version of automobile will be produced.


marger 2 / 2  
Aug 18, 2014   #1
please check it...

In this developed world, everything has a deadline. People are able to use food, clothes, electrical instrument to name but a few just for limited time. I believe also cars are going to be expired in twenty years. In this regard, to explain why there will be fewer cars than today, I elaborate some reasons, for instant, public transportation will be increased, new instrument will be invented, and pollution would be considered more than today.

To begin with, people imply car for traveling not only through the city but among a different cities, even countries. Developing public transportation, people's demands for using a personal car would be decreased. They would have more comfortable and safer travel by using public transportation. Also, one would prefer to go on a trip by train, airplane and ship instead of personal vehicle due to higher speed and high level of security. In this regard, in future people would be less depended to their own car, so the finite number of automobile would be exists in cities.

In addition, by a short glimpse to the past, we could see that all vehicles are evaluated during years. People used to use horses and camels for traveling and community, while acting in this manner is meaningless today. Inventing new and high-tech way for traveling in future, humankind will not imply the car as a instrument. The car would be soon a part of museums.

Last but not least, the more number of cars, the more polluted air, which we breathing every day. In order to decreasing the pollution, governments and scientists will limit or even omit the car from the cities. Although car has a vital role in human life and makes it convenience, people need clear air to be survived.

In conclusion, by taking all above reason, I believe in next year people would use fewer car as the transportation goes ahead and novel version of automobile will be produced. People prefer to have a clean sky to live longer instead of finishing their life after a short time in automobiles.

d_ooo70189 1 / 1 1  
Aug 19, 2014   #2
I think your essay is well-organized; however, there are some parts you can improve
In second paragraph you have provided a complete and specific evidence to support your argument (which is good)
But, in thrid and fourth paragraphs, you only used two sentences to describe you evidence (which can make your argument sound weak)
Your evidence should be more specific.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Aug 19, 2014   #3
People are able to use food, clothes, electrical instrument to name but a few just for limited time.

This idea is not clearly presented as it ends very abruptly. Is this what you meant;
People are able to use commodities only for a short time as new alternatives would soon be found in the market to replace them.

I believe also cars are going to be expired in twenty years.

Here you express your view on the issue topic. So, it is good to finish your introduction with this idea. That would give a neat ending to your intro :)
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,195 459  
Aug 20, 2014   #4
In order to decreasing the pollution, governments and scientists will limit or even omit the car from the cities

Is this you mean?
There are many things individuals can do to reduce harmful emissions to our air, land and water. One of them is to use transport more carefully.


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