Unanswered [9] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


Writing task 1 - the oil production and consumption in China between 1982 to 2006


vanhoa 1 / -  
Mar 21, 2021   #1

graph analysis essay



Question: The line grap below shows the oil production and consumption in China between 1982 to 2006.

Summerize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

My answer:

The given line graph depicts the supply and demand of oil in China over a 24-year course since 1982.

Overall, the period from 1982 to 2006 witnessed an increase in the amount of oil produced and consumed at different rates.

As can be observed from the chart, in 1982, around 1.8 millions of oil barrels per day were demanded and 2 millions of that were supplied. Over the next 12 years, while the figures for oil consumption experienced a gradual rise to 3.5 millions, there was a significant growth of oil production to 3 millions in 1986, before remaining unchanged till 1994.

During the period between 1994 and 2006, the quantity of oil demand grew faster than its supply. To be specific, the data for oil consumption rapidly increased, which hit a peak at over 6 millions of oil barrels each day in 2006. Meanwhile, there was a minimally and moderately growth in the amount of oil produced, just about 3.8 millions of oil barrels per day in 2006.



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Mar 22, 2021   #2
You still have room to make the report more informative. You have only written 169 words. The target word count, for a full potential scoring consideration, is 175 - 200 words. While you did write more than the minimum 150, that does not mean that you met the requirements for a higher scoring essay. There are still points for improvement in this presentation . Please note my observations below:

Par. 1 - Summary overview
- type of measurement used (millions of barrels per day)

Par. 2: 1st Reasoning paragraph
-You should skip saying "As can be observed from the chart" because the idea is the reader cannot see the image. You need to build the image through the data reporting. Skipping this sentence and simply stating the information directly would have helped create a better mental picture of your report.

Par. 3: 2nd Reasoning Paragraph
- Before you report on the peak, you have to indicate the starting demand rate first. The report is incomplete when you give only the peak without a reference to the low point first. The same goes for the minimal and moderate growth, the measurement digits are provided in the image, use it. That is why you were supplied with the information.


Home / Writing Feedback / Writing task 1 - the oil production and consumption in China between 1982 to 2006
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳