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theinvisible 1 / -  
Oct 19, 2022   #1
The older generations tend to have very traditional ideas about how people should live, think and behave. However, some people believe that these ideas are not helpful in preparing younger generations for modern life.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Many traditional moral codes have been passed on for generations. However, much controversy still surrounds the helpfulness of these ideas in facilitating younger generations' future in modern society. From my perspective, except for some obsolete notions, most of the traditional ideas are valuable to younger offspring.

Obviously, older generations maintain a number of inappropriate stereotypes. According to those, homosexuality and feminism are deemed to deviate, or even violate the common norms. Such kinds of discrimination have put women and minor groups of the society at a disadvantage and thus hindered them from seizing many opportunities in life and profession. This situation is inevitably against modern society's targets to promote equality and human rights. Additionally, conventional perceptions advise people, especially low-class and working-class ones, to stay restrained and suffer in any cases of discontent in order to maintain a so-called peaceful life. However, this idea may adversely affect the principles of democracy and civilization of humankind. Only by freedom of speech can burning issues be brought up and tackled.

Despite aforementioned limitations, traditional teachings still sustain lasting values to young generations. This is because those lessons which have been acquired and revised throughout history assemble older generations' knowledge and experience. In order to thrive in modern age, young people should preserve and promote those notions in accordance with contemporary situation. Take, for example, Vietnam where the forefathers always teach their offspring about the tradition of patriotism. That trait was the core factor which helped them overcome a millennium of Northern domination and win two resistance wars against the mightiest empires then. That heritage presents its unchanged value as young patriots are crucial for maintaining cultural character and national independence in the era of profound globalization.

In conclusion, much as some conventional ideas are somewhat invalid in modern days, the core notions remain precious to young generations as those values are obligatory conditions for the sustainable prosperity of modern society.

(318 words)
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,410 4391  
Oct 20, 2022   #2
In the writer's opinion presentation, an invalid response format was used since it did not use the key phrase response expectation. Rather than saying

From my perspective

the opening phrase should have been,"I partially disagree with this statement because some obsolete... "
in order to meet the extent response requirement. Note that the opinion included the required thesis statement to complete the reasoning process.

The second reasoning paragraph should have been the first reasoning statement since it directly relates to the writer's opinion and discussion basis. It is strong and perfect in explanation. A similar 2nd reasoning paragraph along the same lines would have been even better.

Therefore, the essay will be scored based on an incomplete reasoning development since the other paragraph is not aligned with the given thesis statement. It will lower the final score to a great extent.
randombrowngirl 1 / 4  
Oct 27, 2022   #3
Add a thesis statement that summarises what your essay is about and has your view on it
For the format:
para 1: intro with thesis
para 2: for the topic
para 3: against the topic
para 4: conclusion with reiteration of thesis and summary of points