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One of favorite tourist destination is museums and local sites history. IELTS 2


pikul 23 / 26 3  
Feb 4, 2016   #1
Many museums and history sites are mainly visited by tourists rather than local people why is this? What can we done to encourage people to visit museums and historical sites?

One of favorite tourist destination is museums and local sites history. As seen, majority of visitors are foreign society since they have high interested in local culture while local residents are not. Therefore, the most viable solution is conducting special fee for native in particular day.

The main cause of this problem is about the curiosity. According to tourists, they have a tendency to find out the information about culture and local history while they are traveling since museums provide an effective way of learning. A 2012 recent Harvard University study reveals that 90%of people visiting museum tend to remember all of things about the history easily due to the direct experience they got. However, indigenous people are less likely to visit the museum since they have known about the history. This was illustrated in New York Times poll in 2013 that more than 90%of local people were more likely to spend their free time at home rather than at museum as it can't attract them. As a result, this brings museums into lack of attraction for local society.

To tackle this problem, something has to be done by government such encouraging local people to visit museum by reducing the ticket price. This method is believed for some people as the best way to drive people paying a visit to the museums. For example, Angel, an Indonesian psychologists, states that people are bound to be more interesting when they are facing with discount or special price. This results in local people interesting to see the museum.

The aforementioned evidence shows that this notion is caused with the different level of curiosity between tourists and local residents. However, it can be addressed through reducing museum admission price in order to attract people attention.
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Feb 4, 2016   #2
Hi Pikul, I'd like to share my thoughts on your essay.
Kindly find my remarks below.

- One of our favorite tourist destinations
- isare museums and local sites history.
- As seenEvidently , majority of
- visitors are foreign society sinceas they have high interested
- is conducting special fee for native into conduct or offer a special discounted rate on a particular day.

- The main cause of this problem is about the curiosity.
- According to tourists, they have a tendency to find out the information
- are traveling sinceand museums provide
- A 2012 recent ( 2012 and recent both denotes a timeline, so putting the two together is redundant ) Harvard University
- tends to remember all of things
- as it can'tdoes not attract them.
- As a result, this brings museums into lack of attraction forto the local society.

There you have it Pikul, I hope I was able to help and as you can see there's a lot of modification / enhancement needed in your essay specially when it comes to your word choice and input. This is a major set back as it directly affects your essay, so you have to be very careful in doing so.
Linda91 30 / 40 3  
Feb 5, 2016   #3
One of favorite tourist destination is museums and local sites history (historical site). As seen, majority of visitors are (is) foreign society since they ...

... about the history easily due to the direct experience they got. that they got.


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