Opinions about traditional and modern medicines

The Blend of Traditional and Modern Medicine

It is true that there is an increasing number of people who endure various kinds of illnesses and many of which cannot be cured by contemporary medicines due to the modern lifestyle. Therefore, some people claim that it is time to shift towards traditional medicines. From my perspective, people should maintain the use of modern medicines.

On the one hand, there are some reasons that traditional medicines can be beneficial to some extent. The main one is that most of the local drugs are much safer for people's well-being since they contain natural medicinal herbs. Recent research has shown that these medicines cause little or no side effects on patients thanks to their natural components. Traditional medicines are likely to effectively treat many different illnesses, however, it takes a relatively long period of time to recover completely. Thus, some people lose their patience to continue taking traditional medicines.

On the other hand, it is undeniable that the fast-paced progression of modern medicine brings various advantages. Firstly, these medicines are always strictly censored by qualified people in National Agency for Food and Drug Administration and Control before hitting the market, meaning that people's health will be guaranteed based on clinical evidence and science. Secondly, contemporary medicines have the ability to cure some illnesses caused by a sedentary lifestyle. A person who suffers from obesity can use Orlistat for restraining their eating habits, which is one of the treatments recommended by FDA and other specialists, for example.

In conclusion, while I agree with the view that traditional drugs are advantageous in some cases, I still maintain that the most effective way to fight illnesses should be modern medicines. In my opinion, it would be better if people combine treatment with both traditional and modern medicines as each remedy has its own merit.

Do not get into the habit of affirming statements within the opening sentence of of the restatement. It unnecessarily changes the discussion topic foundation as it is not a statement included in the first version. It creates a slight topic redirection and will cause deductions in the presentation. Stick to a restatement that does not offer a change in topic focus or foundation. For basic opinion idea rephrasing, use only 3 - 4 sentences:

- Reword the idea
- Give your opinion
- State the 2 basis of your opinion separately

The essay is problematic in the sense that the writer is opposing his own opinion in the 1st reasoning paragraph. As the topic covers a single opinion presentation, his defense of his belief must be based on I strongly supported and explained reasons. Beyond the idea of using specific linking words and other word usage considerations, the main scores will come from the clarity of the opinion as supported by cohesive paragraphs. The cohesiveness disappears when the discussion fails to link both explanatory paragraphs to the writers opinion through related discussion points and transition sentences/ words.


This is a misplaced statement. Being an establishing opinion reason statement, it should be placed at the end of the prompt restatement + personal opinion paragraph as it greatly adds to the basis (clarity) of the writers opinion. It is a stronger and more convincing statement than the currently presented opinion presentation. IHad this thesis statement been used early on, the current comparative format would have been perfect for the discussion and produced a high score due to the avoidance of conflicting discussion points in the discussion paragraphs.