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IELTS ESSAY: PARENTS ARE THE BEST TEACHERS


johnz777z 1 / 1  
Nov 3, 2012   #1
Hi all, I would like to write my views here. Could someone review and correct it. I would highly appreciate your views on this. Thank you

Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents are the best teachers. Use specific examples to support your answer.

Children are agile, fun-loving and sometimes mischievous and it is very essential to guide and teach them for their development. And many believes that parents are the best one to teach their than any academic teachers. I concur to that view, however, there are credible arguments against it.

The main argument that contravene to the idea of parents as best teachers is that academic teachers can impart knowledge scientifically and could teach wide variety of subjects effectively. Moreover, students could develop their career and later procure an attractive job because of the relentless approach of their tutors. There are, however, good reasons to believe that best teachers are parents.

The plausible reason to for that is parents know their children better and can reach to them more effectively than school teachers. Furthermore, children learn a great deal by observing their parents and this precocious development starts first from their houses and this is their stepping stone for their later part of life. Ironically, school teachers often finds it difficult to reach the students individually in a classroom and thus misses out their psychological and emotional development.

The other reason is that parents are good at motivating and inspiring their young ones, as when they succumb to failure it is the parent who comprehend this at first glance and help them to overcome it. To cite an example, Julie Mathai , a veteran scientist, has dedicated her success to her parents for motivating to pursue her career in a male chauvinistic society that oppress their womenfolk.

To conclude, life is not all about the academic studies and there re psychological aspects that school/college teachers might not help the students and its where parent plays a parents plays a tangible role in the emotional and psychological development of the children. And thats why, I presume, many believes best teachers are parents..

badnerd13 - / 1 1  
Nov 3, 2012   #2
I usually try not to start sentences with 'and'
I am not great with commas, comma-splices and semi colons but I would personally chop the first two sentences up a little bit to increase the flow of reading.

Children are agile, fun-loving and sometimes mischievous. It is very essential to guide and teach them for their development. Many [many who? teachers? parents?researchers?] believe that parents are the best for teaching their children rather than academic teachers. I concur to that view, however, there are credible arguments against it.

The main argument that contravenes to the idea of parents being the more ideal educator is that academic teachers can impart knowledge scientifically and could teach a wide variety of subjects effectively. Moreover, students could develop their career and later procure an attractive job because of the relentless approach of their tutors. There are, however, good reasons to believe that the best teachers are parents.

The plausible reason behind that theory is that parents know their children personally and can reach out[?] to them more effectively than school teachers. Furthermore, children learn a great deal by observing their parents. This precocious development first starts from the child's house and is their stepping stone for later on in life. [not sure if you will need to back that with a source or example of how it is a stepping stone for later on in life]

Ironically, school teachers often finds it difficult to connect with their students individually in a classroom and thus misses out their where it could be aiding in the child's psychological and emotional development.

Another reason is that parents are good at motivating and inspiring their young ones, as when they succumb to failure it is the parent who comprehends this at first glance and helps them to overcome it. To cite an example by a veteran scientist, Julie Mathai, who has dedicated her success to her parents for motivating to pursue her career in a male chauvinistic society that oppress their womenfolk. [[so... where is the cite? is the site everything above that you wrote? or did you forget to include it? Cite is unclear, please specify what it is]]

Very interesting read, good luck!
hvthoteen 16 / 44 4  
Nov 3, 2012   #3
"And many believes that parents are the best one to teach their than any academic teachers"
---> Many believe that parents are the best ones to teach their children

" I concur to that view, however, there are credible arguments against it."
----->you are making a serious mistake in ielts writing when ambiguously stating your opinion.

"The main argument that contravene to the idea of parents as best teachers is that academic teachers can impart knowledge scientifically and could teach wide variety of subjects effectively"

---> The main argument that contravenes to the idea of parents as the best teachers is that academic teachers can impart knowledge scientifically and teach a variety of subjects effectively.

"The plausible reason to for that is parents know their children better and can reach to them more effectively than school teachers."
--> The most plausible reason is that parents know their children better, and therefore reach them more effectively than school teachers.

"Ironically, school teachers often finds it difficult to reach the students individually in a classroom and thus misses out their psychological and emotional development."

--> Ironically, school teachers often find it difficult to reach students individually in a classroom, and thus miss out their psychological and emotional developmet

When i read the conclusion, it is easy to see that you agree with the statement. However it is very difficult to realise your opinion when reading the introduction and body parts.

So i think the most important thing you should do before writing an ielts essay is to make up your mind, choose a side and list the reasons to support your perspective

This is my opinion ;)
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Nov 3, 2012   #4
Children are agile, fun-loving and sometimes mischievous and it is very essential to guide and teach them for helping a positivetheir development for them . And many believes that parents are the best one to teach theirchildren than any academic teachers

you are making a serious mistake in ielts writing when ambiguously stating your opinion.

----- good advice. Yes.... this type of exams need you to state your opinion very clearly in the introduction. That helps you earn more marks.
OP johnz777z 1 / 1  
Nov 6, 2012   #5
Thanks guys for your valuable advises. Next time I will pay more attention to the introduction and my grammar.
MaryMary 1 / 5 1  
Nov 6, 2012   #6
Pick a side. Amiguity is something you should avoid altogether.


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