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Writing IELTS Task 2 parents let children playing computers and tablets


trilestari 1 / 3  
May 11, 2017   #1
QUESTION : Nowadays, parents often let their children play a lot with computers and tablets in order to improve their technological skills.
Do the advantages of the use of these devices from an early age outweigh the disadvantages?


new technology in kids hands



ANSWER:
In recent years, children is permitted by their parents to play much times with tablets and computers due to provide their sophisticated technological skills. In my opinion, it is agreed that these devices give the advantages rather than the disadvantages. Analyzig this circumtance that computers and tablets can make the kids smarter than ordinary typical age group and it would be fluencing their knowledge for the next grow up period.

First and foremost, both of computers and tablets will improve children become briliant people in their golden age. Due to the fact that, in the beginning period of age supplying much more information could built their brain in the best condition. For instance, if an early age people is getting stimulation everyday from the gadget, it will stimulate the brain to record many types of data. So, extra-ordinary kids who familiar with the gadget have a big opportunity to gain excellent person. Additionally, toddler which is usual with gadget often obtain an achievement in their school. Because of, they spent the time for positive activities such as playing games, learning numbers, or watching videos from sophistichated things.

On the other sides, using electronic appearance can be affected children's health. Owing this, if they are spending a lot of time looking up the media, the kids can get eye problem. It is caused that the kids wear a glasses to assist their sight. Moreover, utilizing media without parental advisory will be harmful the kids to see inappropriate broadcasting. So, parental advisory needed to control their child to reach benefit effect.

To conclude, in my point of view the parents who give permit for the child to let using electronic tools provide positive effect rather than negative for their grow up period.

FatmaFaricha 1 / 2  
May 11, 2017   #2
- you have to pay more attention in your spelling dear,
- what is much more? you have choose one of them
- it will be better if you change 'usual' to 'get accustomed to'
- because of + noun
- 'so, parental advisory needed to control their child', where is your verb in this statement??
moh_jawahir - / 7 1  
May 11, 2017   #3
Hi .. Miss Tri,
let me give you some suggestions,

children is are permitted by ...

computers due to provide providing their sophisticated ...

Analyzig this circumtance that computers and tablets can make the kids smarter ..... (you may need one verb again to complete your sentence)

more information could built build after modal, it would be a bare infinitive their brain in ...

if an early age people is getting

kids who (need a verb) familiar with the ...

... gadget often obtains an achievement in their

keep cheers,
hope this helps,

Moh. Jawahir


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