Obese children (IELTS Writing Task II)
(please help me with grammar mistakes, word choices and how many bands I get. Thanks.)
It is argued that there should have punishments issued for parents who let their kids gain too many weighs. This essay disagrees with this statement because children may inherit gene from their parents and parents have wrong belief that fat kids are stronger and healthier.
Children's body weigh are affected by their parents' old-fashioned concept. Weigh is a measurement to determine physical health; so if any children appear to be chubby, other adults will consider them to be healthier than thin ones. These kids are forced to eat more than necessary or fed too much high-fat food as a result. Most of these moms and dads think that normal-weight child is a consequence of lacking cares. A recent study found that 70% of parents who have obese children admitted that they have fattened their kids for having good health.
Genetic conditions are one of the most common causes of making the young generations supersized. When family members cannot escape from them, it is obvious and understandable that no matter how hard moms and dads are attempting to adjust their kids' daily intake, even to reduce a large amount of food consumption; their disappointing weight still remains unchanged. Exercising serves as an effective way to get rid of those excessive calories which makes no difference in this special family-gene circumstance. A recent research concluded that certain genetic traits run in family explaining why it takes longer to burn up calories.
In conclusion, parents should not take any sanctions as their children get obese. The reasons are that they possess genes which involve in body weighs and parent's misunderstanding of being weighty is healthier.