Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 5

IELTS - parents should teach children / or school is the place?


RSD 1 / -  
May 23, 2014   #1
Topic:

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be a good members of society. Others, However, believe that school is the place to learn this.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Answer:

Some people think that it is the responsibility of the parents to teach their children how to become good members of society. On the other hand, some believe that the school is responsible for this. Both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail, before a conclusion is reached.

Parents are the first person for a child, whom they start learning from. They should teach their children about how to behave in different kind of situations. Moreover they should also behave in a manner, they want their children to follow. Because it is proved that children will always try to imitate the actions and behavior of their parents. For example, if one wants his kids to respect elders, then he should also do the same to set an example for their children. If a child starts learning good habits and behavior from the home itself, it will become easier for him to survive in the society.

However, it is not only the responsibility of parents, School and teachers have a great influence on a child's development. Once a kid starts going to the school he becomes a part of the wider community and start learning from his teachers as well as peers. And almost every child has to spend more of his time in school. So even if his parents are teaching him about good habits, he will be influenced very easily by the bad habits of his peers. Thus the school and teachers have to take the ownership to identify these kind of situations and take the respective actions. In this way they can help the students in becoming a good member of the society. Teacher is a role-model for most of the kids, so he or she should guide and motivate them in the right direction.

To conclude, I would say that both the parents and teachers have a great impact in a child's life. So it is the responsibility of parents to guide them about the good behavior in society and as well as make sure that they are learning the same things from their school also.

odon 12 / 27 2  
May 23, 2014   #2
Hi RSD,
a good essay :D
but I noticed some error .

Both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail, before a conclusion is reached.
1 .This sentence is useless.
2. in instead , it is better to state your opinion for the question
yirunli 7 / 17  
May 24, 2014   #3
Parents are the first person for a child, whom they start learning from.

i would say "Parents are the first person whom children start learning from "

in different kind of situations

in different kinds of situations

both the parents

both parents
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,195 459  
May 25, 2014   #4
Both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail, before a conclusion is reached.

Even your prompt is open for discussion, there is no harm you stating your own opinion in the introduction itself. It is nicer when you conclude the intro with a statement expressing your opinion very clearly. That helps you take the reader in your desired direction.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
May 27, 2014   #5
Both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail, before a conclusion is reached.

It is good to conclude your intro with a statement expressing your view on the issue (although your topic asks you to discuss both views, it is good to tell the reader about the direction you want him to follow )

Parents are the first persons for a child, whom they startto learnlearning from. They should teach their children about how to behave in different kindtypes of situations. Moreover they should also behave in an exemplary manner (comma) that t hey wantwish their children to follow. Because it is proved that children will always try to imitate imprint the actions and behavior of their parents.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS - parents should teach children / or school is the place?