responsible tourists have paid attention to preserve about culture and environment. some people believe its impossible to pay attention . to what extend do you agree or dis agree.
With a tremendous growth of tourist industry around the world,regional authorities have faced with the serious issue about preservation of local's culture and environment. Although there are certain people who state the impossibility of paying proper attention toward this problems by tourists, it is agreed that they must do it forthwith.This will be proven by looking at the main attractive tourist' factors such as natural beauties and traditional goods of torist's destinations.
To begin with, it is reasonable to expect from tourists protect environment because they visit primarely other countries in order to observe different natures. If a person did not control own action in the foreigh environment, other tourists would more unlikely to experience these beauties. For example, in Russia, when people travel around the biggest world's lake they try to not use off-roaders, so next generation will be able to see the important natural phenomenon. Thus, tourists' duty in the preserving local's environment can be seen as an paramaunt objective.
In addition to the above, traditionally, people go abroad to exchange goods which are produced only locally. These products have a long correllated history with local's cultures,so they unconsciously support these tradition's productions. To illustrate this, take chinese's tea, for example. Tourists who visit China and buy well-known tea products maintain financially chinese's production and as a corollary the chinese's tea culture. This example shows that if one's society consumes international products they must protect the foreigh's cultures as well.
As a way of conclusion, tourism industry is being pit in the hot debate about its influence on local's environment and traditions. Nevertheless, preseving them is partly a responsibility of tourists and I would argue that it will be more important in the future. Therefore, I believe that tourist are able to pay attention in terms of evaluate properly their action toward oversee's environment and support monetarily foreigh cultures.
responsible tourists have paid attention to preserve about culture and environment.
... this is your prompt and it is not written properly and sounds pretty confusing.
I think you should re-post the title correctly. Without knowing that it is difficult to check the alignment between your writing and the prompt.
Hi Dumi
Big thanks for your feedback.
However,my topic was taken from recent exam questions,which is apparently not well - remembered by people.
I would appreciate if you could still check my essay.
Looking forward to other replies.
Ok :) Let's take your intro;
.... you have a good hook and also you introduce the background very well.... However, you do not clearly state your position on the issue... Conclude your intro with a clear statement of your position.
To begin with, it is reasonable to expect from tourists protect environment because they visit primarely other countries in order to observe different natures.
... this sentence is pretty confusing. Your idea does not flow clearly and I cannot figure out what is the reason you use to justify your position. You better rephrase this line.
Hi Dumi,
As per my personal position, I have learned from Ryan's website for incorporating a following approach.
Instead of using pronounces and used in this essay - "It is agreed that blah,blah,blah,"
I do believe this method works,but maybe you can help me to improve it,and suggest some alternative ways.
As per my first para, i see that it does not work at all,so it is better to redo it.
What about this one?:
"To begin with, tourists primarely travel to foreign contries to observe a diversity of the nature, so it is reasonable that they should protect environment."
Thank you for your help.
I think you did not understand the question. The question is about ' is it impossible to preserve the culture and environment or not'? Your essay is an off topic attempt and you would not score more 6 in task response and coherence. Also, your essay is plagued by many silly errors. More mistakes = the less you score.
In addition to the above, traditionally, people go abroad to exchange goods which are produced only locally. These products have a long correllated history with local's cultures,so they unconsciously support these tradition's productions. To illustrate this, take c hinese's tea, for example. Tourists who visit China and buy well-known tea products maintain financially c hinese's production and as a corollary the chinese's tea culture. This example shows that if one's society consumes international products they must protect the foreigh' s cultures as well.
Again, same problem. Off topic attempt. I think you failed to understand the essay scoring criteria. Your essay would not go more 6 band.
As a way of conclusion, tourism industry is being pit in the hot debate about its influence on local's environment and traditions. Nevertheless, preseving them is partly a responsibility of tourists and I would argue that it will be more important in the future. Therefore, I believe that tourist are able to pay attention in terms of evaluate properly their action toward oversee's environment and support monetarily foreigh cultures.
# Crossed ones are grammar or vocabulary mistakes or cliche.
# learn article and preposition usage (be accurate)
# proof read your own essay before submitting it ( in the exam centre, you would have to do this)
# Read the question carefully and try to respond to the question
# your task response and coherence are around 5 band score
# avoid Ryan's books-- He's a cone man
# try DC coles IELTS, IELTS simon, Chriss Green IELTS (yassi English) or Michael Wattie IELTS (mikkie) ----> google it.
#You need at least 2-3 months of preparation to reach at 7 band , so do not waste your money by booking another exam.
Thank you JethroJosh
To be honest I have waited you reply,as I have read all your posts in this resource.
You are right about proofreading,i missed this part.
I have passed an exam only once around a year ago at 6, now i would like to improve my mark and have already studied 5 months.
My biggest problem is writing because of overthinking.
Please,could you explain to me,why this topic was not about tourists' attention toward the environment and culture?
If so,why the question mentioned responsible tourists?
In a recent ielts competition in Ryan's website we had an question:
"In some cultures, children are expected to follow very strict rules of behaviour. In other cultures, children are allowed to do almost anything they want. What are the merits of each opinion? What is your position on the matter? Include relevant examples in your response."
However,I wrote about each approach, and not about cultural differences.
Now, I am really confuced because of the ielts's questions!
By looking at the first topic it can be seen that an question about "some people believe its impossible to pay attention",
while in the second topic it is "What are the merits of each opinion? What is your position on the matter?"
On which part of an question I should focus?
Looking forward to your reply!
Ryan is not an examiner ; he is just a tutor who wants to market his books and so on. There are many examiners and you can follow their blogs. Just ignore that 'idiot' Ryan who is a cone man. Most of his books are just junks and he boasts himself as a pioneer. He couldn't even explain true/ false/ not given logically in his youtube videos.
Responsible tourists have paid attention to preserve about culture and environment. some people believe its impossible to pay attention . to what extend do you agree or dis agree.
Back ground : Responsible tourists have paid attention to preserve about culture and environment (past).
Argument : impossible to pay attention ( present )
You need to respond to the argument by including the background.
In a recent ielts competition in Ryan's website we had an question:
"In some cultures, children are expected to follow very strict rules of behaviour. In other cultures, children are allowed to do almost anything they want. What are the merits of each opinion? What is your position on the matter? Include relevant examples in your response."
Intro: Rephrase the question+ your opinion
Body 1 : What are the merits of each opinion ? write 2 merits
Body 2: What is your position on the matter? write 2 reasons why you support
Conclusion: restate all the reasons and your opinion again.
