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Peace comes from within, do not seek it without.


Billtwill 1 / -  
May 6, 2020   #1

true happiness is based on peace



Long ago, while having played cards with his childhood friends, he heard them saying: "give me peace please" every time they tossed down a card. At that time, he copied that phrase without understanding what it really meant. At young adult age, he often wished for money, love but never for peace. "May God bring me peace", composed by Lam Phuong when he had a lot of money, lovers and fame. It seems like a paradox but when one possesses plenty of things, he often worries that he may lose them. Why does a successful man want his mind to be peaceful? That is because true happiness is based on peace.

In his late twenties, he sometimes went to Huyen Khong temple for sightseeing. There he found young monks around his age in their brown gown practicing meditation on the hill or beside the lakeside. Then he wondered why these monks chose such a boring life while there were so many interesting things out there. He felt sorry for them. He assumed that they might not be fortunate to get a good education so that they would be able to have good jobs in order to manage their lives. He often had a drink with his friends at expensive restaurants and bragged about their success to each other. Then they spent great time together in discotheque with beautiful dance-girls around. What such a wonderful life!

When his life was up, he was surrounded by dozens of friends, most of who were like him. Fast living. Hanging out every night, pubs were homes, night-clubs were classrooms. Among many friends of his, one was unique. This guy was a veggie whom he regarded as a dud. He liked hanging out with pals who dreadfully flattered his revelry. They vowed to live and die together when they got drunk.

When his feast-days were over, he remained nothing but a weary body and mind. It was fortunate for him. If there were no downs in his life, what would he end up? He, a playful hare had wandered all corners of the wood to find flowers and fruits until one day he felt tired of everything and fell flat in a creek. The man who saved his life was not one of his sworn brothers but the guy whom he once considered a slow tortoise. He was a person who could control everything but his mind.

When his mind was jumping around, his tortoise friend gave him comfort and took him to the temple where he found everybody very nice as if he was wearing new glasses. Perhaps those who frequently went to temple are gentle and decent in nature. Or at least they had a make-up on their minds like him. They all spoke softly and behave gently. In the long run, their mind would become more beautiful without make-up.

Though he was a man of leadership talent and oratory skills, he chose to clean the Buddha alter and the temple garden whenever he came to the temple. He found peace of mind in doing so. He also liked explicit teachings of the old monk that many felt bored listening to. He also felt peaceful recently when he was with his dad whom he once thought of as an unpragmatic and obsolete man. His dad is taciturn and almost never teaches him anything.

His dad is a living example that peace comes from within. He has always stayed calm even when his life was rough. For many people, having peace means retiring from life, avoiding challenges or withdrawing from the pursuit of our dreams. It is possible to have peace even when we pursue our material goals. Peace comes from inner attitude. Peace does not arise from the world outside, but the way we react to the world outside. Some believe peace comes when we complete our plans and accomplish our goals. If that is true, we almost never reach that condition as we tend to dream of another thing after achieving our goals.

On Lunar New Year, the crowd made him anxious so he walked to the pond behind the temple. He came across a monk about his age sitting meditation in calmness without an earthly emotion. He who once took pity on these monks now feels sorry for himself. The good point is that he has stopped.
kayzee 2 / 5 1  
May 6, 2020   #2
Overall this thought feels like a deep sense striking through this writing but left in the middle somewhere leaving it incomplete. It should have a more subtle and fulfilling conclusion.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,797 4780  
May 7, 2020   #3
This is a confusing story. Though it tries to be insightful in approach, the total lack of character background and clarity in the setting held back what would have been a pretty interesting piece of writing. In relation to self-discovery, self-awareness, general observation, and assessment of others, the paper tries to be an intellectual piece. The problem, is that there is not enough of a backstory to support the character development and growth throughout the writing.

I thought you were actually discussing a human being, as he even had a name indicated in the writing. However, you suddenly identified the main character as an animal. A hare, whose friends were also animals. That totally changed the way the reader saw the characters, the attitude, and the characteristics of the characters portrayed in the writing. You confused the reader. You should have made it clear early on that the characters are not human, but animals who represent human characteristics. That would have made the use of the human name more acceptable and less confusing. You could have said that the hare was the human's animal/spirit guide or something. You just should have made that part clear in the presentation. That is why the writing feels incomplete and with a conclusion that did not seem to make any sense. It did not round up the story in a manner that gave it closure.


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