Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

Some people argue that the great device to communicate people should be internet


aflah15 32 / 18 4  
Feb 1, 2016   #1
It is generally believed that the Internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information.

Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that the great device to communicate people should be the internet since it provides much information which is easy to access and up to date. However, others assume that it is not the most appropriate media to gain news because every person can upload any explanation which has not clear sources and very subjective. I strongly believe although the internet presents doubtful information, users find much easiness in their communication, especially between people who live apart by operating internet.

These days and ages, the internet is very accessible for every user. It is very easy to create a wrong issue and upload it as everyone has a large right to construct a private account in the internet. Blogs are the main example, now there are many blogs which present sorts of anonymous references since they just plagiarize information from certain sources and do not put the identity of original writers. Also, bloggers tend to combine their subjective opinions with information that they want to share, they contaminate the real information. Therefore, the internet will be an inaccurate place to gain information.

Although there are people who do not use the internet wisely, it helps citizens to build an effective and communicative communication. The internet has used in several decades and improved people's chance to access information. In the past, citizens took very long time in their long distance communication, but today there is the internet which allow people to keep up to date and keep in touch not only with local country, but also people who live in other countries. They just go on the internet and find any facilities such as Facebook. Fortunately, it is affordable for every person and takes only several minutes to make both verbal and textual communication. Hence, it is a great means for communicating people around the world.

All in all, it is clear that the internet can spread inappropriate news since every user has a large opportunity to provide negative and wrong information. However, it develops residents' communication since they just need a shorter time to share and/or gain any information. People can maximize the useful of the internet if they read and analyze carefully news that they read, watch, or listen, especially the sources to ensure that they find the accurate descriptions.
fijarakbar25 11 / 13 2  
Feb 1, 2016   #2
Here some suggestions from me

However, others assume that it is not the most ...

HOWEVER, OTHER ASSUME THAT IT IS NOT THE MOST APPROPRIATE MEDIA TO GAIN THE NEWS SINCE IT IS VERY SUBJECTIVE, PEOPLE COULD EASILY PUT THEIR PERSONAL THOUGHT AND IT SOMETIMES HAS NO RELIABLE SOURCES.

effective and communicative communication EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION (I think it is enough that way)
vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Feb 1, 2016   #3
Siti, I have a question for you. Why are you discussing the ability of the internet to keep people in contact with each other when the prompt is asking you to give your opinion as to whether the internet is the best place to get information? You did not accurately understand the prompt requirements and went off tangent by presenting an opinion that is not in accordance with the question being asked of you. Therefore, you have a flawed opening statement and thesis statement. This means that this paper will get a low score, based upon the problematic presentation of the prompt requirements.

You concentrated your discussion on the way that the internet serves as a communication tool for people when the real argument was supposed to be centered upon the ability of the internet to provide accurate information. Keep in mind that the last part of the essay prompt held the actual instruction for your writing. The first part was just an introduction for comparison purposes.

Facebook is not the correct example to use in this essay. The best example would have been either Wikipedia or any search engine. Maybe even the websites themselves since some of them sell advertising instead of offering useful information. You should have given more thought to understanding the prompt and using more relevant examples and discussion tools.


Home / Writing Feedback / Some people argue that the great device to communicate people should be internet