Some people deny changes and choose to stay in their comfort zone

People naturally resist making changes in their lives. What is the kind of problems can cause this? What solution you suggest? Give the reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

answer
Human change is a natural law. Some people, however, against changes and chooses to stay in their comfort zone; while, the others have hard effort to get variation in their life. Therefore, the human changes also followed by several triggers which are personally different. Anyway, I believe that being resistant cannot develop people to get actualization. Then, we should be braver to out of our comfort zone.

It is undeniably that most of people are staying in the circumstance of their coziness. They tend to do their daily presented and noted as the destiny that they should do. For instance, a marriage women do their daily as house wife such as clearing house, cooking, serving husband without any desire to do more outdoor. However, sometimes convenient life occurs because people are afraid to face the different environment. We can see that most graduated school children do not prefer to continue their study neither in the same city nor in abroad.

Futhermore, as a developing figure, we should improve ourselves to be better life. This can be gained if we bravery breaking our comfort zone and facing the new challenge for actualize ourselves. For example, Hellen Keller, dumb orator, braved to defeat her weakness and success became proficient with her disability. This success story is not only for Hellen but also for people who broke the block inside his (hers).

To sum up, it is difficult to overcome from a good condition; therefore, we might brave to move forward for self actualization purposes.

Change is a natural phenomenon that every human has to face with.


People choose - "people" is a plural word and therefore what you've written above is wrong.


This is a pretty confusing sentence. I think you need to improve the structure more and pay more attention to your grammar.

thankyou dumi, here I try to change


some people, however, against change and choose to stay in their comfort zone


I believe that being resistance obstruct people to actualize themselves.

I want to mention that monotony cannot make people actual.

"being resistant" is the right form of grammar. What dumi has mentioned is that your overall idea is not clear to the reader. What do you mean by "actualize themselves"?


I still cannot get this idea, don't know whether dumi would :)
what do you mean by making people actual? Do you mean that making people more realistic?

people actual like self improving
I want to mention actual seems like improving yourself
I believe that being resistance obstruct people to improve themselves. could you get my idea ?

I'm not sure whether these phrases and expressions are authentic English regarding the meanings you want to present. Try not to use phrases and expressions you aren't familiar with.

would you kindly please mention the other phrases beside those which you suggest more suitable. This very helpful for my improving
thank you

SHanafi
I know few academic words, but sometimes simple words are not bad choice.
For example: "the others have hard effort to get variation in their life." can be " the others make great efforts to change their lives."

this useful enough, simple and understandable. thank you :)

I prefer to place all or part of the main sentence at the end of the sentence. Like this: While others have..., some people... This focuses on the reader's attention on the complexity, rather than the simplicity, in this way address the essay's topic.


This is the pattern for the concluding paragraph I suggest:
1. a 'conclusion' signal: In conclusion, ....etc,
2. a summary of the main points or a restatement of the thesis (in different words!)
3. a final comment, based on the information in the essay
The final comment can be:
3.1. a warning or prediction (often using the first conditional: If ..., ... will ...)
3.2. a suggestion or recommendation (often using should or must)