People need fight against unfairness of authorities decision and protect themselves from its results

just started to study sat essays plz help me out. and also plz score 1 to 6 my essay in ur way

Many people believe that people must obey their authority's decision. However I believe that people should protect rights and stand up against authority's wrong decision because sometimes it leads people to disaster.

Sometimes superior's dogmatic decision is not what people truly want. Dogmatic decision sometimes asks workers to sacrifice what they have. For example, there are many workers who work at their work place on weekends against their will, even though they had worked on their full weekdays. Workers work on weekends because their superiors want them to, otherwise superior will fire workers who disobeyed decision and hire new workers; this is why workers establish labor union.

Labor union is probably the most effective way to protect workers' rights because group of people's power is much stronger than individual's. For example, when workers feel they are unfairly treated by their superiors, workers will gather up and protest over superior's power by labor dispute. Labor dispute is very strong and effective way to fight against superior's decision because labor dispute not only gets attention from superior but also attention from media so that people in society will know about their protesting.

Eventually, superiors will talk to workers and try to make compromise because superiors are afraid not only that workers' labor dispute will last long enough to make a more loss to their company but also cynical views from society, acknowledged by media, which will damage their company's image. After workers and superiors made a compromise, workers will get back to their positions, and workers will get their rights back or even more. I think that act of labor union is one good example why workers should protect themselves from dogmatic decision that forces workers to sacrifice.

Probably, not questioning authority's decision will make society function more smoothly. However, I think that people should gather up and fight against unfairness of authority's decision and protect themselves from authority's decision that is mistreating people.

What is the purpose of this essay? TOELF? IELTS? It's good to know why you wrote this to base our comments on more task specific requirements :D

Any way, let's have a look at your introduction;


This is not bad, but you should have introduced the topic in more details. It is always good if you have a hook statement, which is the opening sentence that comes with a punch to grab the reader's attention. Here you do not have a hook. It can something like;

Authorities reserve the power of decision making to themselves. ... remember, your hook should not only be interesting, it should be relevant to your topic too :)

its for sat

In my opinion, i think you should try to provide a wide range of your word. For example, the word "believe" is used in 2 consecutive sentences. On the other hand, your second paragraph seems focus on Labor union but not on your main idea.

Hi
You should have opened this thread in "Writing Feedback" forum which is the most appropriate forum for this type of essays. (I moved it from Graduate forum to Writing Feedback). It is a forum rule and also it would help you earn more feedbacks. Also, include the purpose of writing (e.g. IETLS, TOEFL etc.) in the title itself so that others would be able to provide more task related comments.