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IELTS Task 2: The people who must give responsibility to solve children unhealthy lifestyle problem


daveandrei 14 / 8 5  
Nov 15, 2015   #1
Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?


In this era, people want everything moving quickly because they worry about time. Moreover, because of sophisticated technology facilitate people to work or do something easily. It causes a new problem in an expeditious world such as unhealthy lifestyle. It is like consuming fast-food, lack of exercise, sitting a long time in front of computer or television. Pitifully, these things happen to many children.

Nowadays, many children have a bad habit. In my opinion, I extremely believe if both of schools and parents must give a hand to solve this problem. Because they are people who interact and can teach children immediately. Children learn more from school. So, school have the capability to train children to avoid unhealthy habit. The teacher can give some advice and example about the effect of unhealthy lifestyle. Thus, parents also have a controlled to their children. Bad and good habits come from their home. Parents are the first person who can teach children closely because children are often 'copycat' their parent lifestyles or habits. Parents must form their children's healthy lifestyle such as do not giving junk food to children, taking their children to a gym, swimming pool or somewhere which can make their children doing exercise than playing games in their home.

In other hands, there are some people who can participate to fight in this problem like government, non-government organization, media and some actor-industries. A government needs to make some laws about fast-food restaurant's standard such as giving a standard for nutrition in fast-food or do not give permission for a fast-food restaurant to open in the night. A non-government organization ought to organize some events which invite children doing an exercise like running event, football challenge for children or something else. Media must diminish some advertisements and news about junk food and other unhealthy lifestyles which can make children interested doing it. The last, some actor-industries have to think seriously to create products which make people still doing a healthy habit.

Finally, there are so many actors who must give responsibility to solve unhealthy lifestyle problems in children. Yet it basically starts from schools and parents because they play a role as a model who can be imitated by children.

eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Nov 16, 2015   #2
In this era, people want everything moving quickly because they worry about time. Moreover, because of sophisticated technology facilitate people to work or do something easily. It causes a new problem in an expeditious world such as unhealthy lifestyle. It is like consuming fast-food, lack of exercise, sitting a long time in front of computer or television. Pitifully, these things happen to many children

It is claimed that children today live in a sedentary. As such, people argue that school and parents should take this issue into account. While this notion is utterly acceptable, I believe that government, non-government organization, media also have responsibility to endure children live health .

As you can see, I have made some changes. It is always good to put your opinion upfront, so the examiners know what you are trying to argue in the body paragraph.


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