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IELTS: more and more people are going to other countries for significant period


chaaaany 2 / 3 1  
Apr 7, 2014   #1
Hello, everyone.
Thank you for reading my essay.: )

TOPIC: These days, more and more people are going to other countries for significant period of time, either to find job or to study. There are clearly many benefits to doing this, but people who live abroad can also face some difficulties

Over the last two or three decades, an increasing number of people tend to go abroad for their careers or education. As a result, starting a life in another country is becoming quite popular in our society. However, is this development positive, or are there more drawbacks than advantages? In this essay, I will explore the pros and cons of living in a foreign country and try to draw some conclusions.

I will start by looking at the advantages. One of the major plus points of moving another country is the face that you could enjoy your new surroundings, and life seems like a holiday. Obviously, facing different customs it is extremely different to your home country.

Secondly, living in a foreign country for a while could help you to get some benefits in learning foreign languages. For example, if you take education in another country as a student, you will achieve next level of the foreign-language.

On the other hand, you could face some serious problems when you are in this situation. Such as, having a feeling of isolation due to communicating in a second language or a culture shock and the general cost of living and so on.

In conclusion, although it is clear that go to other countries face a range of problems, it is undoubtedly possible to start a life in there. You need to improve the positives of the better lifestyle father than the negatives of different languages and cultures. Personally, I believe the benefits in terms of personal growth eventually outweigh any drawbacks.
techgeek 7 / 13 1  
Apr 7, 2014   #2
Again really good structure and the range of words you use is also very big. Personally, your conclusion is just perfect. :) I am sure, you will get excellent band in IELTS. Wish you luck, buddy! :)
SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Apr 8, 2014   #3
Helow friend

let me analyze your prompt
Topic :These days, more and more people are going to other countries for significant period of time, either to find job or to study
Discussion : many benefits to doing this vs some difficulties living abroad

To me personally, you already answer the prompt. Then, I suggest you to enrich your idea which is included inside each paragraph.
Here I try to write down mine based on your idea in the first paragraph

I will start by looking at the advantages. One of the major plus points of moving another country is the face that you could enjoy your new surroundings, and life seems like a holiday. Obviously, facing different customs it is extremely different to your home country.

.... Going overseas brings enjoyable feeling while we experience different magnificent landscape. Not surprisingly, indigenous people interest to travel the different surrounding as the effort to pursuit their mood in order to refresh mind from daily density. As an example, a human resource manager living in Macao,crowded city in Hong Kong, visits Raja Ampat ecological park beside do his job in Sorong, Indonesia.

hopefully it helps you...
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 8, 2014   #4
On the other hand, you could face some serious problems when you are in this situation. Such as, having a feeling of isolation due to communicating in a second language or a culture shock and the general cost of living and so on.

This is good, but shows complexity. Let me give a few edits:
Having this situation, culture shock and language barriers are big problems. Burden high cost of living, people face as well.
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 14, 2014   #5
It is always better if you take much consideration for this sentence:
Developing the classical five paragraph essay or more will send you to earn a very impressive result, but this should be followed by a succinct explanation, coherent sentences, grammar error-free, colloquial usage, etc. Otherwise, you may get an average score.
Abdurasul 32 / 86 4  
Apr 15, 2014   #6
In conclusion, although it is clear that go to other countries face a range of problems...

I am not an excellent writer, but I think it is just the set of words. Try to be more precise!
I hope it will help))


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