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People are more independent in the modern world? - IELTS


fdrik 1 / 2  
Mar 27, 2011   #1
Some people think that in the modern world we have become more dependent on each other, while others think that people are now more independent.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.


People have different views regarding the trend of modern world. Although some people believe that every human being rely on one another, I argue that people enjoy more freedom in this world than earlier and do not need any support from others.

There are some good arguments that support the view that people are reliant on others. Firstly, life is more difficult and expensive and we are less sufficient. This means that in this world no one is perfectly skilled and we need support from others. Secondly, for some reasons youngster rely on their parents for longer. The youngster are now less capable of facing challenges of life. Unemployed people get state benefits. They are totally dependent on the government for their livings. Finally, our jobs are more specialized that we need to work in teams.

Despite of above arguments, I believe that people enjoy more free life without any help from others. The invention of modern machine were proven to be more reliable and efficient. As the result of this man is fully dependent on machine work. Electronic media like internet solve the problems without any support. The modern families are more dispersed than earlier and therefore provide less support. Education allows person having more freedom to make the choice. For example, graduate with high qualification can make independnt decision for his life than person who has just passed secondary school.

In conclusion, from my point of view human life is more independent than in past because of the modern technology. Families and relative are less communicative to each other as they live apart.

BrookW 4 / 12  
Mar 27, 2011   #2
Hi Fdrick,

I think your evidence don't strongly support your argument in the 3rd paragraph. Modern machines such as cell phone, and internet seem to help people more in connecting with each other. High qualification may help on making decision independently, but experience and suggestions from others seem to be more important in many occations.

Futhermore, I think the latter view of the topic is only to say "more independent", but your point "don't need any support from others" seems to be a little more extreme.
OP fdrik 1 / 2  
Mar 28, 2011   #3
HI BrookW
if i would hae write the same essay in the ielts can i able to get 7 bands
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,341 129  
Mar 29, 2011   #4
People have different views regarding dependence and independence in the modern world. ----I changed this first sentence so that it is totally clear. Try writing that same sentence about some other topics, too. You can use that sentence for many different situations.

Although some people believe that every human being all human beings rely on one another, I argue that ...

Finally, our jobs are more specialized, and as a result we need to work in teams.

typo: make independnt decision ...

You made a good argument! I guess the truth is that we have become more dependent in some ways but more independent in others.

:-)


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