Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 5


People prefer live today in some urban areas and communicate less with local residents.


ibal28 20 / 30 5  
Aug 29, 2016   #1
Question

In the past most of people lived in small village where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays, most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were advantages and disadvantages of living in small community?

*********************************
Answer:

Introduction
Time flies so fast and gives an influence of people's live. People are more likely to live in rural area previously than in the big city. However, people prefer living in urban area with less of communication with local residents. In my opinion, to live in rural area has a positive effect such as we will be easier to build a relationship each other. Also, people would often help other individuals. In reverse, It also has a negative effect like they will dependence with other people in the same community.

Conclusion
All in all, live in the small community have a benefit like we can help other people that would become a way for being closer with them. In spite of that, it also has drawback such people in the rural area more likely to wait for favor from another person. So, it will decrease personal quality of rural people. I would suggest it is necessary that people have to plan where they want to live by choosing places wisely.
Terminal23 6 / 10  
Aug 29, 2016   #2
halo ibalbal, i would comment your passage,

... will be easier to build engage a relationship each other.
... a negative effect like they will dependence depend with other people ...
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Aug 29, 2016   #3
Time flies so fast and

You do not need to spend your time writing this flower language in IELTS writing. It is always good to go straight to the point rather than beating around the bush.

People are more likely to live

people prefer

It seems that you still have problem understanding the prompt given. A closer look at the question asks you to use past tense, as some sentences are written with past time

In my opinion, to live in rural area has a positive effect such as we will be easier to build a relationship each other.

Also, people would often help other individuals

These two ideas can be merged as to avoid being redundant. Here is the sample: Living in rural area made people easier to build their relationship, and therefore they were more likely to help one another rather than those who live in other areas.

In reverse, It also has a negative effect like they will dependence with other people in the same community.

The converse would be true as they rely too much on others.

live in the small community have a benefit like we can help other people that would become a way for being closer with them.

More benefits such as close and string boundary relationships can be seen if only people lived small community

In spite of that, it also has drawback such people in the rural area more likely to wait for favor from another person.

However, people are more vulnerable to live due to their dependency.

So, it will decrease personal quality of rural people.

This results in personal quality of rural people decreasing.

Hope this helps :D
a heap of luck
rian31 14 / 22  
Aug 29, 2016   #4
hai ibal
i just try to examine your task

i think there are several notion for using an range of vocabulary
for instance people can replace by dweller, citizen, or society


... gives an influence of people's lives .
... area with less of communication withand local residents .
... has a negative effect likefor example they will dependence with each other people in the same community.

... benefit like we can help other peopledwellers that would become
... also has drawback such peoplesociety in the rural areavillage more likely to wait for ...
... personal quality of rural peopleoccupant .
Faridadwi18 67 / 104 13  
Aug 30, 2016   #5
Hi Ibal,

Time flies so fast and gives an influence of people's live.
... live in rural area previously than in thea big city.
... area has a positive effect such as wewill beit is easier to build a relationship with each other.
... people in the rural area more likely to wait for favor from another person favor.

Hopefully it helps.Keep writing.


Home / Writing Feedback / People prefer live today in some urban areas and communicate less with local residents.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳