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More and more people are seriously overweight. The solution to this problem.


hihihihihihi123 1 / -  
Jan 14, 2022   #1
Q: More and more people are seriously overweight.
Some people suggest the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?



A: There is no denying that the number of obesity in humans is increasing dramatically day by day. according to experts, the solution is to impose a higher price on fast foods. To some extent, I agree that this is a brilliant suggestion, while I also believe that this isn't the only way that we could think of.

It is true that rising food prices tend to create hesitation when a person is about to purchase it. In light of economic hardship, people need to consider carefully before any payment because money doesn't grow on trees. And when it comes to fast food which is obviously not human stable food, consumers will probably choose to not buy it anymore once the cost is increased. another explanation for the mentioned fact is that people are accustomed to buying fast food at an affordable price. This sudden change is likely to curb the craving for junk food among eaters.

However, pushing the price is not the only solution that we could come up with. One another viable remedy that I could think of immediately is to raise the awareness within individuals about a healthy and fitness body. For instance: encouraging citizens to exercise daily or go to the gym if they are not able to do it themselves. Exercising or gym is not only helps overweight people to get their desired body but also improves their health from the inside. For example, running, swimming is both great ways to burn fat and build muscle while bicycling makes your legs more flexible.

All in all, there are various recommendations to reduce the seriousness of overweight that people can refer to alongside increasing the fee. That said, humans' consciousness is still the most crucial factor in the process. In conclusion, I'd like to send to all the fat people out there: what you need to do right now is to forget about that bowl of French fries and get up, do something active and be more patient with the result
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,308 3991  
Jan 15, 2022   #2
The writer has not provided a simple restatement of the topic. When rewriting the topic presentation, the personal opinion presentation or any other information reference must be avoided as it changes the original topic projection. When the topic representation carries added information, the examiner will have no choice but to reduce the possible score for that section since it is no longer in accordance with the original content presentation.

To some extent, I agree that this is a brilliant suggestion

while I also believe that this isn't the only way that we could think of.

The extent response is correct but not properly formatted for the presentation. Consider that the second half appears to run counter to the measured response and you will understand why the score will be faced with deductions. Had the writer framed this as " I agree that this is a brilliant suggestion to the extent that this isn't the only way..." then the writer's opinion + thesis statement would not appear to be contradicting each other.

The concluding paragraph must not contain additional discussion presentations anymore. It must only restate the topic, writer's opinion, and reasoning subjects. When new information is included, it will not be given a score and will instead, force deduction upon the concluding paragraph due to incorrect discussion format problems.


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