Unanswered [21] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

People in the world need natural resources to supply their energy. Not everyone is able to use it.

Lita27 16 / 21 2  
Apr 7, 2016   #1
Alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, wave and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal, oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

People in the world need natural resources to supply their energy. It has been decades that humankind still have dependence on fossil fuel to make electricity, drive machines and provide heating. Due to the fact that today this carbon-based fuel is in the edge of scarcity and contributes more to climate change, global citizen and government are becoming far more aware of renewable energy. However, most people in some parts of the world still believe that several environmentally friendly energy sources, such as wind and wave power as well as solar energy are costly and sophisticated to be applied to subtitue the current power. In the term of this notion, I personally do not support it since in some countries, these sorts of power have been implemented cheaply and successfully.

Previously, setting up alternative energy is unaffordable and too complex to be established. The reason of this is that the equipment and other supporting elements only supllied by limited companies so that they monopolise the market and sell it with high price. In addition, an article in The Economist magazine stated that compared with traditional power stations renewable generators are cheap to run but require big amount of money to construct, which makes them quiet difficult when it comes to the capital cost. The article also informed that the component, include electricity grid, imposes huge budget as to deliver the eletricity from the power stations to the city have wide and long journey.

However, today the certain condition concerning alternative energy resources application is in the opposite position. One of energy concervative organisations, Green Peace has been conducted some research and surveys about this type of power generators. It stated in its published article that in recent years the cost of solar and wind energy have experienced a decrease. The cost of this power supply competitive with coal, gas and nuclear in the US. In comaparison with coal, wind energy in India can compate it the same price and create same amount of energy, and also the solar power in there will reach parity in 2016. Turning at the reliability and the easiness of a non-coal energy source, it can be said that the difficulties become obsolete. An illustration to support this is that in particular country it works well. Portugal generated more than 70% of its electricity from renewable energy sources during the first quarter of 2013. Thus, for certain state, it is evident that the idea of giant expense for alternative energy and its complexity is just a myth.

To conclude, the cost of renewable energy sources compared to coal, oil and gas is contending. It is apparent that the implementation of this energy is well-established in mentioned country. It prove that alternative energy resources is ready to go and reliable.
ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Apr 7, 2016   #2
Lita, this is the longest IELTS task 2 that I have ever read. This long-essay will badly damaging your time efficiency, and you will not be able to complete both tasks. I suggest that you have to reduce the number of words use in your essay. In addition, you made another fundamental mistake in conveying too many unnecessary details and some unnecessary spelling errors. When talking about grammar, everyone always have the same issue, but the proportion is different, because there is no perfect writing after-all. Yet, spelling-errors can be avoided by the help of spelling-corrections that we all have in our computers or laptops.

Grammar errors:

- cheap to run adequately affordable to run (be careful, the word 'cheap' sometimes inappropriate to be used in several contexts)
- makes them quietquite (this is also common mistakes that should be avoided, both words have different meaning)
- as to deliverin delivering
- .....to the city. have wide and long journey(this sentence has too many verbs, but no connector)
- The cost of this power supply competitive with coal, gas and nuclear in the U.S. (no verb)
- It prove(S)

Spelling errors:

- subtitue = substitute
- supllied = supplied
- eletricity = electricity
- concervative = conservative
- comaparison = comparison
- compate = compete

As you can see, I hope you learn many things from my feedback. I hope to see many improvements in your future essays.

Keep writing and good luck! :)

Home / Writing Feedback / People in the world need natural resources to supply their energy. Not everyone is able to use it.