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'The perceived greatness of any political leader' - GRE Essay


sonutulsiani 1 / -  
Oct 8, 2011   #1
The perceived greatness of any political leader has more to do with the challenges faced by that leader than with any of his or her inherent skills and abilities.

Write a response in which you examine your own position on the statement. Explore the extent to which you either agree or disagree with it, and support your reasoning with evidence and/or examples. Be sure to reflect on ways in which the statement might or might not be true, and how this informs your thinking on the subject.
Hello

I have been preparing for GRE and I just wrote my first essay. It's an issue essay. I set my timer for 30 minutes but I went on to write for 45 minutes. I have written an essay after a long time, so please give me tips where I could improve. It would be really kind of you. Thanks.

Question: The perceived greatness of any political leader has more to do with the challenges faced by that leader than with any of his or her inherent skills and abilities.

Write a response in which you examine your own position on the statement. Explore the extent to which you either agree or disagree with it, and support your reasoning with evidence and/or examples. Be sure to reflect on ways in which the statement might or might not be true, and how this informs your thinking on the subject.

My answer:

While a political leader requires skills and abilities to carry out the day-to-day operations, the real greatness of a political leader is measured by his way of overcoming challenges. A number of individuals participate in the elections in the first place to become a political leader. Once the elections are over, the leaders have to constantly look for the well-being of the people. This leads to different challenges such as travelling constantly, delivering speeches and so on. A leader who lives up to these expectations can be called a great political leader.

Firstly, overcoming the odds of being elected as a political leader depends on the potential of the individuals and how they tackle this challenge. For this purpose, the leaders have to frequently deliver speeches in order to convince the people of a country. A leader should take up the challenges of making eloquent speeches, convincing phrases and words and so on. While this might lead to exaggeration of speeches, it might also convince the people to cast their vote for this individual. This type of challenge is the first step in trying to inform people about the plans that the individual has in mind. These plans should later be put into place in order to be a good political leader.

The demands of people are unlimited. Hence, it is the responsibility of a political leader to take into consideration the demands of people and fulfill them. This will ensure that the leader, who was elected by the people of the state or nation, is working well. This is a challenge that most leaders fail to overcome. While they are successful in the elections, their plans of welfare of the people may or may not work if attention is not given to this issue. A leader could implement his/her plans by making sure members of a particular department and the responsible executives of particular organizations are working effectively or not. The leader should provide ideas and advice the members to make sure they understand the task at hand. Thus, the challenge of serving the people is difficult, but an essential part of leadership.

As a leader, he/she might not get private time with family. Leaders are required to constantly travel from region to region or from state to state to participate in meetings or to visit different areas for regular inspection. As a member of the public, the challenge may not be clearly seen. However, in order to accurately measure the greatness of a leader, the time he/she devotes to the regular meetings or inspections have to be taken into consideration. The challenge of sacrificing personal time with family while devoting to the public should also be considered to be a quality of a great leader.

All in all, a leader undergoes many challenges from the time of election to the time of re-election because during this period, a leader not only has to deliver speeches or constantly travel but also has to ensure the general members of the public are happy by implementing the plans properly and ensuring every member of a particular department, committee or organization is working responsibly. A leader would be considered great once he/she is successful in overcoming these challenges.

Leah_Writer - / 46 4  
Oct 11, 2011   #2
I teach for a test prep company, so I see a lot of these sorts of essays. The best thing you can do in an Issue essay is to give specific examples. You have great ideas, but specific examples will make your points even stronger. I think your essay is really well organized, though, which is one of the things they're looking for. Try doing one in thirty minutes, instead of forty-five. I bet you can do it because you're definitely on the right track here. Your use of language is also strong, so I think the major thing to improve is really specific examples. One, or at most, two is all you need. I would say this essay is probably at the mid-range level now (7 or 8 out of 12) but with strong and specific example or examples added, could be a really high scoring essay. Good luck on the GRE!
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Oct 12, 2011   #3
While I agree with what Leah West has said about your writing, I think the focus of your essay has slightly deviated from the theme topic. I think you need to deal more with the fact that whether it is the leader's inherant skills and abilities or his experience make him a great politician. In this scenario, you need to show how the inherent skills and abilities help a politician to succeed over his experience or vice versa. Or both factors contribute equally towards his greatness. In any case, you need to support your argument with examples that help convince your ideas to the reader.

Your English language skills are excellent.


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