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The percentage of people's consumption - four necessities and four different countries in 2009


Anna94 47 / 56 3  
Nov 28, 2016   #1
The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009

A breakdown of the percentages of people's consumption in four necessities in four different countries in 2009 is presented by the bar chart. Overall, housing was the most things United States spent much money. While healthcare was the lowest important thing for life demands, especially for United Kingdom.

Firstly, two countries in America continent, United States and Canada had almost the same percentage of spending money for food at around 15%. However, Canada spent much money than United States. In transportation and clothing, Canada overtook the top position of those expenditures by around 2.5%. Nevertheless, US expended one in twenty larger in housing and around 2.5% in healthcare respectively than Canada did.

Meanwhile, United Kingdom and Japan had the largest point in transportation expenditures. However, UK spent 5% larger than Japan did, at less than a fifth. UK expended much money for housing and it reversed in food, in which they had 2.5% of difference. Both countries subsidized money less than 5% in clothing and healthcare. 166w


  • bar chart

nurainiyusuf16 47 / 83 6  
Nov 28, 2016   #2
Hello Anna!
Allow me to give you some suggestion :)

... in four necessities for four different countries ...

Overall, housing was the most things ...

You may use accommodation for paraphrasing housing

US expended one in twenty larger ...

Unclear sentence, I guess you put wrong data here
US expended one in twenty larger in housing and around 2.5% in healthcare respectively than Canada did
US in housing = almost 25 percent
One in twenty = 5 percent

United Kingdom and Japan had the largest ...

Wrong data again here!
US = 17.5%
UK = 15%
Canada = 20%
Japan = 10%
The United States and Japan had the largest point in transportation expenditures.

Honestly, I couldn't find a clear grouping in your task.
May your next task will be better. Fighting!
OP Anna94 47 / 56 3  
Nov 28, 2016   #3
@nurainiyusuf16
Thank you for giving me some suggestions
I can see how people read my essay from the comments. I groupped those by continents, so two countries in body one located in America as i wrote above and two countries in body two as non-America. Actually, i picked up the data did not by the actual figures, but the difference figure as comparison, but it might be unclear statements to be understood.


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