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IELTS 1: the percentage of public community and prosperity in 8 different areas in the worldwide


lily89 7 / 6  
Apr 4, 2016   #1
The table chart illustrates the percentage of public community and prosperity in 8 different areas in the worldwide. Overall, it can be seen that there is not correlation between the number of society and the level of wealth whilst Chinese individuals are the first-rank of population and North Americans have the highest number of weal compared with other locations in the world.

Moving to the more detailed analysis, China dominates the global community at nearly a quarter of population followed by Other Asia Pacific and India which are of the same proportion at just over 15 percent in the same category. While 15 percent population in whole wide is European, it decreases a-third in African. Moreover, the total group of Latin American and Caribbean, North American, Rich-Asia Pacific's people are seen a gradual decrease respectively.

In addition, the highest number of wealth is seen by North America at almost 35 percent. Mostly European is more prosperous than Rich-Asian Pacific people while the others only have a small proportion in the same group.



ANSOR99 10 / 6 3  
Apr 5, 2016   #2
Hello Lily, ..i would like to attempt to correct your essay so that it can be better than before..hopefully, here are..

The table chart illustrates the percentage of public community ...
My Alternative Introduction: The graph describes the proportion of inhabitants and internationally affluence in the eight different regions of the planet. At first glance, the population reveals the highest figure than the global wealth for three continent such as North America, Europe, and Rich Asia Pacefic, while other five categories of areas shows the reverse.

... followed by Other Asia Pacific and India which are of the same proportion at(of) just over 15 percent in the same(similar) category. While 15(%)percent(of/from) population in whole wide is European...

Moreover, the total group of (people who come from) Latin American and Caribbean, North American, (and) Rich-Asia Pacific's people are seen a gradual decrease respectively .[/quote]

Note: sist, i hope that you can more concern to use various vocabularie and make proportional the sentence, all about grammar, and if you want to use @respectively---do not more than 2 items. hopefully can help you. Break a leg!


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