My pets - chicks; Yun Tai Mountain attractions

Well, during the summer vacation in the year when I was 10, my parents and I went to Yun Tai Mountain that is one of famous tourist attractions in Henan Province.

On the last day of our trip, we went to the Souvenir Street where there were various kinds of souvenirs for visitors to select. My parents just bought some wood carvings that could represent local styles. For me, I bought 4 adorable chicks. You know, they were not the usual chicks that farmers raised in the farm but the one species of pheasant. By the way, they were not the national protected animals so they can be bought and raised as pets.

When we got home, I made a nest for them with cotton and hay in my yard. Everyday in the afternoon, I would go to the park that was not far away from my home to catch insects for them, sometimes, I also took them to the safe lawn where few stray cats played around and make them run freely. Days with them went by quickly and happily. Maybe it's hard to believe that they had accompanied me for 7 years, but they really did. You know, they got me through my secondary school and high school. In fact, they were not just my pets but my friends who heard a lot of secrets of me and saw my most secret faces. I always talked to them and they seemed to be able to understand me, like dogs.

So, I guess you can understand that how special and precious they were for me.

Can anyone else help me correct my essay?

i really like your essay. its a very good one and in fact i enjoyed reading it. but there were few things that i think were off. Forgive me, but i think were you wrote:

For me, I bought 4 adorable chicks. [font#FF0000]You know , they were not the usual chicks that farmers raised in the farm, but the one they were species of pheasant. By the way,they were not the national protected animals so they can be bought and raised as pets.

i think the sentence needs a little restructuring because starting a sentence with "You know" and continuing with "By the way makes the whole sentence to not flow. The whole thing must flow so you should write this instead:

For me, I bought 4 adorable chicks. And you could obviously tell, just by looking at them that they were not the usual chicks that farmers raised in the farm but the one species of pheasant. By the wayWhat made the whole trip even better was that they were not the national protected animals so they can be bought and raised as pets.

and also the last sentence
So, I guess you can understand that how special and precious they were for to me.

... I wish you changed the order of this sentence;
When I was ten years, my parents had me accompanied with them to the famous Yun Tai mountain in Henan Province which is one of the major tourist attraction of that province.


On the last day of our trip, we visited the Souvenir Street which offered a vast collection of souvenirs for the visitors.