Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4


IELTS: phone calls in UK; 35 billions minutes in 2002


Mowonight 9 / 19 3  
Apr 2, 2014   #1
Hi, 3 days remaining before my test, I hope I'm approaching the perfection in term of structure at least. My current problem is the time, I didn't respect the 20 minutes for this task, since I try to be very careful in my hand writing. That's why i'm a bit scared for saturday!

----------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------

The pie chart below exposes the time spent by UK residents on different type of telephone call, between 1999 and 2002.

Overall, local calls were the highest throughout this period. Even if the gap between the figures had narrowed considerably.

Local calls gradualy climbed of 5 billions minutes each year from 1995 to 1998. The figure reached the top notch of 90 billions in 1999, before plunging over the period 2000 to 2002.

Conversely, nationals and internationals called rose steadily from 36 to 46 billions during a half decade, until plateau just on 60 billions minutes onwards.

A closer look at the mobile's calls shows an upward trend from 1995 during 4 years. Whether the very early of the 21th century recorded a rocketed time passed through mobile phone call in UK (almost doubled comparing the year 2000 and 2001), the trend calmed down in 2002 where this number reached 35 billions minutes.



andial 21 / 48 3  
Apr 2, 2014   #2
Conversely, nationals and internationals called rose steadily from 36 to 46 billions during a half decade, until plateau just on 60 billions minutes onwards.

I am not sure that the increase is happened during a half decade . Please try to look at the graph more precisely

until plateau just on 60 billions minutes onwards.

. "plateau" in this occasion seems like not appropriate, knowing there is no information provided after 2002.

the trend calmed down in 2002 where this number reached 35 billions minutes.

.. In my view, calm down is used only if we can know the trend after the year mentioned
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 2, 2014   #3
3 days remaining before my test

This writing is well organized (with 4 paras), is very communicative and is on the points.
I think readers including the assessors will see what you are like from how you write, not just from what your language is like mechanically. Overall, keep this good writing.

Good luck for your exam :D
OP Mowonight 9 / 19 3  
Apr 2, 2014   #4
Thanks to both of you !

eddies yes, my point is not to obtain full mark but enough to have a correct average.

:-)


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS: phone calls in UK; 35 billions minutes in 2002
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳