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WRITING TASK 1: THE PICTURE BELOW SHOWS HOW TOMATO KETCHUP IS BEING PRODUCED


mango bee 1 / 1  
Jul 5, 2021   #1

WRITING TASK 1 - The diagram



The diagram illustrates the various stages involve in making ketchup of tomato.Overall,the whole process is a cycle which can be divided into 11 stages.It begins with harvest tomatoes and finishes in the delivery of the final product.

Firstly of all,having harvested,the famers sorted good and bad tomatoes for purpose difference,following this the tomatoes were sent to factory in which remove stalk,seed and skin for crushing in container.Before decoction process,the liquid was then added with salt,sugar and vinegar.Having left about 2 hours,the process involved in pouring into bottles and labeling.After this step,to ensure goods,the ketchup was managed in quality control and transported to supermarket.Tomato ketchup was used with fires and hamburgers



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,223 4319  
Jul 6, 2021   #2
The essay is guaranteed to receive a failing score since it is only composed of 111 words/ 150 words. The word count problem arose from the improper paragraph formatting. There should be 3 paragraphs presented here at a minimum, 4 paragraphs the most. There is an error in the procedure description. The images comprise 3 stages of an 11 step process, not 11 stages. The procedure is for making tomato ketchup, not ketchup of tomato. The second paragraph was written too quickly. There is no analysis of the steps presented. The drawings indicate a visual meaning that the writer must put into words. The lack of analysis further contributed to the lack of word count.
OP mango bee 1 / 1  
Jul 6, 2021   #3
@ Holt thank you for your explaination
ducdepzai123 1 / 2  
Jul 6, 2021   #4
personally , you need to write enough 150 words , and use more formal structures to show the diagram. lastly , you should separate your body paragraph to 2 passages.


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