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IELTS Task 1: PIE CHART - WATER USE PROPORTIONS


elinita123 2 / 2  
Oct 29, 2021   #1
Please leave some comments on my writing. Thanks a lot!

the percentage of water used for different purposes



As can be seen, the pie charts compare data on the differences in the proportion of water consumption for agricultural, domestic and industrial purposes in six continents of the world

In general, water for agriculture accounted for the highest percentage in Asian areas, Africa and South America whereas in North America and Europe, water was mainly used for industrial purpose.

To be more specific, the largest proportion of industrial water use can be observed in Central Asia with more than eight-tenths of the total water used. The proportion of industrial water use was lower than the numbers for household purpose with a gap of 2% in Africa and Central Asia and 9% in South America. South East Asia, however, presented the opposite with 12% for industry and only 7% for domestic use.

In terms of North America and Europe, it is obvious that industry sector consumed the highest amount of water, constituting 48% and 53% respectively, Moreover, the water for agriculture in both continents was also larger than the figures of household use, which tripled in North America and more than doubled in Europe.



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Oct 31, 2021   #2
in six continents of the world

Enumerate the continents. Additionally, this should be presented as the second summary overview sentence.

Asian areas

There are 2 areas cited.These need to be identified individually for accuracy purposes in the trending statement.

To be more specific

Why the over emphasis?This is unnecessary since you are doing a general rather than a focused report. Using that phrase does not imply analysis, just a focus on a topic. It is not needed in a task 1 essay.

You have the potential to score well in this essay. Just remember that you need to provide specific data at the start and offer comparative analysis accurately throughout. More practice is required. This presentation is a good enough start.
iam5102 2 / 5  
Nov 5, 2021   #3
agricultural, domestic, and industrial purposes

Pay attention to punctuation and don't let these errors affect your score.
rosigenious 1 / 4  
Nov 5, 2021   #4
I think you should not describe Overview too detailed.


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