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Plenty of books had been read by women and men from 2011 to 2014 at Burnaby Public Library


mem77 62 / 98 6  
Oct 28, 2016   #1
The line chart gives information about a plenty of books which had been read by women and men from 2011 to 2014 at Burnaby Public Library. Overall, despite having an upward trend, both of them showed a different increasing rate.

According to the chart, in 2011, more women read book at Burnaby Public Library with around 5,000 while a slight number at 3,000 was showed in men. This leads to a narrowed gap between them. On the other hand, in 2014 a number of books that has been read by male experienced a considerable increase by 11,000 whereas a less marked increase showed in the figure for female and therefore the gap between them was widened.

A more detailed look at the graph shows that, between 2012 and 2013 female readers increased slightly to 10,000, while a considerable growth showed in males in the same year, causing an intersection. Next, while a marked decrease was seen in female readers, the figure for men increased significantly to 14,000 at the end of the year, successfully overtaking woman figure and reaching its peak.




akbarmappiare 31 / 469 275  
Oct 28, 2016   #2
Hi Edho..
Actually, your writing is a good job. However, I give you a few corrections to enhance the quality of your writing.
Please, meet my notes and deal with them.


... information about A plenty NUMBER of books which had ...
Overall, despite having an upward trend, both of them ...
Overall, all figures experienced significant changes in the number of books read. Eventually, men read more books than women.
(Keep in your mind that each good paragraph has at least three sentences so that you should create 2 sentences for the overview)

..., more women read THE book at Burnaby Public (...) was showed in AS THE RATE OF men MALE READERS. This leads HAD LED to a narrowed ...

... has been read by maleS experienced a ...

... the graph shows that, between 2012 and 2013 THE female readers HAD increased slightly ...
Next FOLLOWING A YEAR, while a marked decrease ...


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