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Majo 1 / 1  
Feb 9, 2011   #1
This is a paragraph about Paul Ehrlich's Theory " The population Bomb". I have to explain why Do I agree with this theory. Pleaseeeeeeeee! I NEED SOME FEEDBACK :) Ill be more than glad

Ps. its for tomorrow LOL

Population growth has caused several biases in the humanity evolution. In 1968 Paul Ehrilch's in his theory of "The Population Bomb" predicted that in the year of 1970 "people will starve to death in spite of any crash programs embarked upon now" due to the rapid population growth. The demanding of food increased, and although not everyone was dying of hunger back in the 80's, it began to hit some countries with the economy. Ehrilch also stated that with overpopulation the demand of technological advances will increased, affecting the environment and perhaps, destroying an ecosystem. Ehrilch not only argued how fast the population was growing but also how fast it was evolving; and it seemed to be evolving without limits. It is as more population is, more demands from the public, which means: Building more houses, more schools, more transportation, more technological discoveries. This leads us to create "overpollution", damaging the environment.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
Feb 12, 2011   #2
Oh, I'm sorry I did not help in time.

You tried to explain too much in the first paragraph. You tried to explain EVERYTHING! It is better if you give one sentence that tels the reader about the theory. Then... leave room at the end of the first paragraph, because after you write the body paragraphs you will go back and write a thesis statement.

In each paragraph, explain why the theory is strong and reasonable. Make sure you use a new paragraph every time you make a new argument. In each paragraph, quote him or summarize part of his idea. End each paragraph by telling the reader why this is a reasonable point.

At the end of the first and last paragraph, give the main idea of your essay. The main idea of your essay should be the main reason his theory seems correct to you. This is actually a simple thing to do, so enjoy it! :-) I hope you are doing well in the class.
OP Majo 1 / 1  
Feb 12, 2011   #3
thanks :) I really appreciate the help and feedback! hahaha its okay it you help late LOL! at least i know how to write better paragrpahs now ;)!