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IELTS practice-Government should subsidize traditional arts? by doing what?


terry_tian 1 / 2  
Dec 5, 2013   #1
Now days, it is easy to see that public interest in traditional arts has largely eroded and thus many those participants have to give up and turn to other opportunities. With my view, traditional arts play an indispensable role on civilization and government need to take effort to preserve those heritages.

Traditional arts, music, acting or art works for example, reveal people's love, fear, value and faith of their time, by spreading among people and generations and shared those values, lots of people are cultivated and our current civilization gradually shaped. For example, China is famous for huge number of forms of traditional arts, from building, clothing, poem and calligraphy to china which eventually become the name of the country, and that is probably why it is called the most ancient civilization.

However, most traditional arts now are no long part of our lives and market is closing the door to them, thus the responsibility to preserve those human fortunes is handed over to the government. There are, with my experience in my country, indeed some things could be done by government. First, government could buy typical traditional art companies which are top and have long history, reputation and fame. By doing this, those companies are saved and artists working for those companies could get ride of commercial pressure and dedicate themselves to work. Secondly, government could also award those artists who have made remarkable contribution to traditional arts regularly and publicly on media, this allow general public have a chance to access to and learn those traditional arts.

To sum up, I think traditional arts not only entertained people, but also cultivated them and eventually civilized a country. Government should subsidize those arts and preserve them to give people an access to learn the past and then benefit us in a further civilization.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Dec 6, 2013   #2
No two words, you have excellent writing skills. If you wrote this essay well withing the allocated time, then you really don't have to worry about this task and expect a very good band at the exam. I don't have anything to comment on improvement as I find almost everything is perfect. I only hope you have managed time, if you had a difficulty do all your practice tests with time.

Good Luck!
OP terry_tian 1 / 2  
Dec 6, 2013   #3
oh my God, thank you for overestimating my writing skills, however, I just got a 5.5 band from IELTS test half an moth ago...
greenleaf 4 / 20 7  
Dec 6, 2013   #4
Some corrections for your essay:

and thus many those participants have to give up and turn to other opportunities

First, government could buy typical traditional art companies which are top and have long history, reputation and fame. By doing this, those companies are saved and artists working for those companies could get riderid of commercial pressure and dedicate themselves to work. Secondly, government could also award those artists who have made remarkable contribution to traditional arts regularly and publicly on media, this allows general public to have a chance to access to and learn those traditional arts.

allow somebody to do something

To sum up, I think traditional arts not only entertained

people, but also cultivated them and eventually civilized a country.

This is a fact, so I think you should use present simple tense.
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Dec 6, 2013   #5
oh my God, thank you for overestimating my writing skills, however, I just got a 5.5 band from IELTS test half an moth ago...

That's five months ago... May be you have improved hell of a lot by now :D

Traditional arts, music, acting or art works for example, reveal people's love, fear, value and faith of their time,by spreading among people and generations and shared those values, lots of people are cultivated and our current civilization gradually shaped.

.... the first part is very well written, but the second part (in bold letters) is pretty confusing to me. I think this is what you try to say;

Traditional arts, music, acting or art works for example, reveal people's love, fear, value and faith of their time by conveying those emotions through their whatever form of art. This had helped people to pass down their values to younger generations.


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