(Practice writing) - Survey of adult education, motives and costs

There are two graphs, which severally illustrates that the motive of adult education and the opinion of distributing its cost.

Overall, the significant purposes of grown-up education are interestingness and achievement. The most common reason are helpful for the jobs or improvement and enjoyment. Meanwhile, the considerable proportion of its cost is suggested that it should be borne individually and employers.

In the first chart, it shows diverse reasons of adult education. As the main reasons, interesting in the subject and to gain qualifications reached 40% and 38%. In addition, the thought of helpful for the current job or improving prospects of promotion and enjoying learning or studying displays each approximately 20%. Whereas, to able to change jobs and to meet people merely show 12% and 9%.

In the following diagram, it represents how the costs of each course are shared. The percentage of the viewpoint in individual payment is 40 percent relatively higher. Secondly, the percentage of paying costs by employers shows 35%. Further, 25% is shared by the taxpayer.

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Xu, aside from grammar problems, your essay also has some formatting problems. Let me fix that for your reference below.

There are two graphs, which severally illustrates that the motive of adult education and the opinion of distributing its cost. REGARDING ITS COST DISTRIBUTION.
Overall, the significant purposes of grown-up education are interestingness THE ADULT'S INTERESTS and achievement. The most common reasonS are ADVANCED EDUCATION IS helpful for the jobs IN JOB IMPROVEMENT, or PERSONAL improvement and enjoyment. Meanwhile, the considerable proportion of its cost is suggested SUGGESTS that it should be borne SHOULDERED EITHER individually and OR BY employers.

- Your opening statement needs to properly deliver a summary of the graph content. By combining the single sentence with the paragraph below it, the essay becomes properly formatted with the 3-5 sentence requirement.

... diverse reasons of FOR adult education. As the main reasons, interesting in the subject and to gain JOB qualifications reached 40% and 38% RESPECTIVELY. In addition, the thought of helpful for the current job or improving prospects of FOR promotion and SIMPLY enjoying learning or studying displays each approximately RANKS AT APPROXIMATELY 20% EACH. Whereas, to able to change CHANGING jobs and to meetING people merely show 12% and 9% EACH.

In the following diagram, it represents how HOW the costs of each course are shared. The percentage of the viewpoint in individual payment is 40 percent relatively higher. Secondly, the percentage of THAN THAT OF EMPLOYERS SHOULDERING paying costs by employers shows 35%. Further, IT IS BELIEVED THAT 25% is SHOULD BE shared by the taxpayer.

The most common reason are (the most common reason is) helpful for the jobs or improvement ...

it should be borne individuallyandemployers. --> "and" to determine the level of same words
interesting in the subject and to gain qualifications reached 40% and 38%

... enjoying learning or studying displays (display) each approximately 20%

Thank you

... individual payment is 40 percent, and it is relatively higher . ... costs by employers shows 35%. Further, , and 25% is shared by the taxpayer.