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Preservation of tradition - IELTS argumentative essay


Catherine_11 1 / 1  
Apr 18, 2020   #1

traditional ways of life



With the development of morden society is the loss of traditional ways of life
Is it important to keep our traditional ways of life?
How can this be achieved


In this day and age, with the development of society, many nations around the world are coping with the problem of losing the customary ways of life. This essay will argue that it is essential to keep traditional values and these traditions will be achieved by many ways if people take this into consideration by the two main reasons.

First of all, traditional ways of life represent unique features of every couyntry in the world. We bring these traditions to all over the globe, introduce our own characteristics such as table manners and greetings. This will make people understand more about the country and as a result, it becomes famous. For example, if we see a person of a family celebrate the Lunar New Year, you will guess they are Asians.

Secondly, to educate people about traditions is to preserve the old ways of life. We will help people raise awareness about the loss of the traditions and suggest them the solutions. By this way, we will educate the people, especially the young generations, who are now tired of learning about the folklore and tend to catch up with the morden world. For instance, schools or parents should take the youths go to the national museum to discover everything about the ancient ancestors.

In conclusion, the preservation of tradition shuold be highly noticed by many people and we shuold act now to keep these old values alive.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,797 4780  
Apr 18, 2020   #2
The essay is short by 13 words. Coming in under the word requirement means you will receive heavy points penalties. The penalties will be based on the 13 words required to complete the 250 minimum word requirement. Now, just meeting the word requirement will not be enough to have to write above the requirement, but not too much that you end up focusing only on the word count instead o the quality of the discussion.

This is a direct opinion essay that asks:

- Is it important to keep our traditional ways of life?
- How can this be achieved

There are two things that you have to achieve in the first paragraph:

- The rephrasing of the given topic
- A direct response to the question (yes / no will suffice)
- A suggestion on how it can be achieved.

The last 2 lines should respond directly to the questions with:

- The conventional way of life needs to be upheld
- raise awareness about the loss of the traditions and suggest them the solutions

Unfortunately, you forgot to this in the first paragraph. Also, you did not directly respond to the given question in any aspect of the essay. This will tell the examiner that you are providing an incomplete response. An incomplete response will result in... you guessed it, scoring deductions. Always double check the original prompt against you draft essay. Make sure you respond directly to the questions and offer direct suggestions for solutions as required.

These problems with your essay are the main problem points that will result in notable points deductions which will result in a non-passing score.


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