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Preserve old buildings whenever possible or construct new buildings


Betrug 1 / 2  
Aug 18, 2021   #1

restoring or replacing old buildings?



In the present day, modern buildings are more popular than ever, because of that reason old buildings now have very little value. Some people begin to think that it is good to preserve old buildings whenever possible. Other people think that it is preferable to construct new buildings. Both ideas all have their advantages and disadvantages.

In the first opinion, old buildings can be used for tourism, especially sightseeing. By exploring old structures we know more about our past, and it's also a good way to remind us about our culture. To illustrate, most of the results in many researches by historians, were found by investigating aged houses. At those places they figured out many vestiges about ancient generations. Thus, unmodern houses may not contain many stayable values but they have a lot of historical values. But besides that, they might waste too many places and money, which can be used to build modern buildings, the ones that really have physical values.

On the other hand, the advantages of constructing new buildings is undeniable, they bring us a convenient, modern place. Present-day structures compare with earlier versions are more secure, steady and harder to decay. For instance, in the past the durability of old houses helped them be undestroyable by natural factors for 5 years, now a modern house can stand for 10 years. Contrasting with old buildings, new buildings have more physical use but less spiritual benefits.In the past, when globalization hadn't happened yet, every country had their own type of architecture, dissimilar features. But the world is different now, people always want the best version, so buildings are more and more similar. If we just focus on building new things, our traditional values will sink into oblivion over time.

In conclusion, preserving old buildings have many immaterial meanings but nearly have no practical use and the benefits and drawbacks in constructing new buildings is converse. From my standpoint, whatever it is, conserving old things or building new things, the most important thing is we have to balance it, so that we not only can develop our architecture, but also maintain our traditional culture.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4770  
Aug 19, 2021   #2
From my standpoint, whatever ... our traditional culture.

This is the response to the question provided for the discussion. It should be in the restatement + personal opinion paragraph first, then repeated in the summary conclusion. This is a clearer personal opinion statement when compared to the restatement and opinion entry. This creates a more academically formatted thesis statement.

Vocabulary building is a must for this student. He must avoid making up English words. Terms such as " unmodern" do not exist in any English dictionary version. It will lower the vocabulary score for the exam taker.

in the second paragraph, the explanation suddenly changes from the value of old buildings to a reason why it should be torn down. This is an unexpected turn that reduced the clarity of that sentence. Unrelated points must be transitioned into and discussed in a seperate paragraph to preserve coherence in the discussion.

The essay is actually proof of academic discussion skills on the part of the exam taker. Further improvement is required in specific sections to further boost his score in specific areas.
OP Betrug 1 / 2  
Aug 19, 2021   #3
@ Holt Thank you
huyjunnie 4 / 11 4  
Aug 19, 2021   #4
I just want to point out some problems (maybe not too serious) that you have made.
1. You shouldn't use the short form of any words. (Ex: is not --> isn't). It makes your essay less academic.
2. I just realized in most of the sample writing that some examiners really enjoy using a pair of "on the one hand" and "on the other hand". Therefore, it may not a good idea to use only "on the other hand".

3. It seems like your essay is lack of some linking words in some sentences.
Ex 1: the advantages of..., they bring us ... (you connect two clauses without connectors)
Ex 2: ... by natural factors for 5 years, now a modern house ...(where is the connector?)
4. Research is an uncountable noun, so using it as a countable one is inappropriate.
5. You shouldn't overuse some words (ex: conserve). There are some alternatives that are interchangeable. And don't be confused between "conserve" and "preserve". They have the same meaning but their usage is totally different.

Hope these pieces of advice will help you.
OP Betrug 1 / 2  
Aug 20, 2021   #5
@huyjunnie
It's very helpful for me, thanks


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