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IELTS; Can price hikes on fuel solve environmental problems?


shaddy 17 / 47 7  
Apr 14, 2013   #1
The best way to solve the world's environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Environmental problems are rapidly increasing all over the world. Scientists infer that this is due to burning of fuel such as petrol, coal and gas etc. Some people think that the use of fuel can be controlled by increasing its price whereas others believe that the threats to the environment can be controlled by introducing other sources of energy and supporting researchers for their environmental problems research. In the following essay I would look at both sides of the argument and provide my opinion in light of the results.

The people who consider increase in fuel price is the solution of environment pollution give reason that this will cut down the use of cars. As most of the people prefer to use their personal vehicles to for travelling and increase in fuel price will force them to stop using them. Moreover this will motivate them to use public transports for daily travelling to work and other places. As a result, there may be a large reduction in the number of cars on road, so this this will help to lower the air pollution.

The supporters of the other side of argument, however, argue that instead of increasing fuel prices other actions should be considered to minimize environmental issues. Both government and individual must take it seriously. Individuals should buy the cars which emit less fumes. At government level, the authorities should educate people to use other sources of energy; for example light energy and water energy to generate electricity instead of coal, patrol or other kinds of fuels. Moreover they should support researchers in finding other ways of minimizing impacts of fuel burning on our environment. The research for running vehicles on other resources such as water and solar kits must be funded. By doing so, the threats to our environment can be reduced.

In conclusion, I believe that we should look for other ways to reduce environmental pollution caused by fuel instead of increasing prices of it.

_____________________

Hi guys

I would appreciate your time and efforts if you could comment on my essay.

Regards
S

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Apr 14, 2013   #2
Environmental problems are rapidly increasing all over the world.

Environmental issues are on increase at a threatening speed.
Very good introduction.

The people who consider increase in fuel price is the solution of environment pollution give reason that this will cut down the use of cars.

The people who believe that increasing fuel prices is a solution for environmental pollution, think that this action would reduce the usage of private vehicles.

As most of the people prefer to use their personal vehicles to for travelling and increase in fuel price will force them to stop using them

. ... this is a repetition of the previous line. It's not needed.

The supporters of the other side of argument, however, argue that instead of increasing fuel prices other actions should be considered to minimize environmental issues.

... tell why they don't like price hikes - reason is they don't like to burden people with higher cost of living
malhamed 9 / 19  
Apr 14, 2013   #3
it seems like a good essay to me but

The supporters of the other side of argument, however, argue that instead

i feel like there is some thing wrong with this one
OP shaddy 17 / 47 7  
Apr 14, 2013   #4
hikes - reason is they don't like to burden people with higher cost of living

Thanks dumi.

I am just wondering if this is an acceptable approach to write an opinion essay? As you may find that I put forward some reasons to agree and then more reasons to disagree. At the end, I concluded with the disagreement part of it.

When I started writing the essay, another approach also jumped into my mind and that was about stating my position in introduction and writing the rest of the paragraphs just to support my opinion.

Which one do you think is best in this kind of essays where a look at both views is not asked explicitly?
OP shaddy 17 / 47 7  
Apr 14, 2013   #5
i feel like there is some thing wrong with this one

Thanks malhamed. Are you able to please elaborate this? I am preparing for IELTS exam and targeting band 8. Any suggestion regarding this would be appreciated.
malhamed 9 / 19  
Apr 15, 2013   #6
well, I said i feel but I am not sure its wrong... plus am not the best to do this but if I was writing it I would write it like this:

on the other hand, many people think that increasing fuel ...
OP shaddy 17 / 47 7  
Apr 15, 2013   #7
on the other hand, many people think that increasing fuel ...

Thanks man !!

Cheers
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Apr 15, 2013   #8
I am just wondering if this is an acceptable approach to write an opinion essay? As you may find that I put forward some reasons to agree and then more reasons to disagree. At the end, I concluded with the disagreement part of it.

.... this is alright. You can give reasons for this argument in one para and against in the next one. Then express your opinion in the conclusion. However, this is the difficult way of tackling this task within the given time. It's not wrong and certainly acceptable, but time consuming :)

When I started writing the essay, another approach also jumped into my mind and that was about stating my position in introduction and writing the rest of the paragraphs just to support my opinion.

... I vote for this because then you know what you need to do in the rest of your essay. Not only you, even the examiner would know what he's going to follow in the next parts. So, this approach would be more helpful for you to manage time and present a neat essay :)


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