Priority: Industrial skills vs Education?

Hi...
Please, can you make some amendments!

Question:
Should developing countries concentrate on Improving industrial skills or should they promote education first?

Answer:

In this modern life, almost all of the developing countries of the world have to make extremely hard decision. These countries have to choose right way forward and have to put right priorities between education and industry. I personally believe that putting education system in the first place is an appropriate course of action.

From my point of view, every developed country has very well-structured education system and as a result, they have developed industry too. In this sense, good education system is basic tool to develop all the spheres of a country, including: industry, economy, agriculture and others. Moreover, in order to revolutionize industry, country has to be provided with high-qualified specialists, who have high level of education. In my opinion, the priority of education over the industry is the only way to welfare comprehensively.

However, the other side of the coin is that, promoting industry is the fastest way to economical prosperity. Moreover, it can create a vast amount of work places. However, it can be considered as a short-term prosperity, because after some time this country will probably have a lack of specialists. Therefore, I contend my position that education is in the first place.

By way of conclusion, one must admit that prioritizing education is the only right way forward, because of its comprehensiveness and long-term prosperity.

The priority of education over the industry is the only way to welfare comprehensively... it should be'' The priority of education over industry is the only way to benefit comprehensively''..

promoting industry is the fastest way to economical prosper not prosperity...

I personally believe that giving a higher priority for the education system over the consideration of improving industrial skills is an appropriate course of action.

From my point of view, every developed country has very well-structured education system and as a result, they have developed industry tooachieved a higher level of industrial skills too.


In the body paras you give a reason to justify your opinion and support that reason with a specific example (I don't find such example here)

Yes, give one reason per body para and support that with a specific example. I guess we have provided you with an appropriate structure for this task in your other thread. Read the sample essays we have cited there to get a better idea about this structure. :)


The ideal places to express your opinion are the introduction and conclusion (you reinstate your opinion here). Body paras are not good places to do that as it gives a bit of repetitive feeling to the reader.

Thanks dumi, you're very helpful :)