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[IELTS] The private motor vehicle and air pollution


gowtham 1 / -  
Nov 6, 2013   #1
Question:-
The private motor vehicle has greatly improved individual freedom of movement; moreover it has become a status symbol. Its use through have impacted negatively on city centers as a whole.

What are some serious problems brought about by private motor vehicle use, how can its use be reduced?

Answer:-
Nowadays there is a tremendous increase in private sector vehicles usage. These individual automobiles ensure personal convenient and at the same time it gives air pollution and traffic problems.

Due to technological innovations and mass production in automobile field most of the people are able to own their vehicle at an affordable price. It also shows their economic level by having a [model and features of automobile] / [type of vehicle and its features]. For instance in my relative family, they strongly believe that, for having an automobile vehicle like a car or bike/four or two wheeler represents financial status of a family. They prefer to own an advanced model vehicle whether they using it or not.

Most of the people in my country/India like to travel in their weekends. They celebrate those days with their family members and friends, for that they feels their own vehicle is more convenient than the public transport system.

Even though private vehicle ensures personal convenient at same time it exists/delivers/produces dangerous gases to the society. The vehicle exhaust creates air, water and soil pollution. In this case we may not leave the outcome and its effects; it spoils the nature and the comfortable environment to the entire mankind.

To avoid pollution and traffic problems from private motor vehicle usage governments implementing innovative solutions like sub-urban trains, metro trains and many technological advancements. By providing comfortable journey in affordable price to the people through public transport system individual vehicles and its dangerous outcomes can be minimize.

Providing basic education and awareness about private vehicle exhausts to the people will develop the realization of dangerous outcomes and motivates them to travel in public transports.

In conclusion, it would to apt to say that, by implementing technological advancements in public transport system and basic education, governments can ensure safe and comfortable journey to the people. It helps to minimize the private vehicle usage in tremendous manner.

Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Nov 6, 2013   #2
Nowadays there is a tremendous increase in private sector vehicles usage

this is grammatically incorrect :(
Nowadays, there is a tremendous increase in usage of private vehicles.
Try and construct simple sentences. One sentence per one idea. Also, try to use direct speech as much as possible because that will help you avoid grammar mistakes.

Theseindividualprivate automobiles

.... the words "individual" and "private" have two different meanings. Individual meaning single or separate while private means belonging to or for the use of one particular person or group of people only. It is always very important to use the most appropriate word in essay writing.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Nov 6, 2013   #3
It also shows their economic level by having a [model and features of automobile] / [type of vehicle and its features].

I don't understand this sentence :( Why do you have some phrases in brackets?

Even though private vehiclesensuresensure personal convenientconvenience, at same time it exists/delivers/produces dangerous gases to the society[/quote
[quote=gowtham] The vehicle exhaust creates air, water and soil pollution

The vehicles emit gases that can cause air, water and soil pollution
You need to pay more attention to grammar. Try and use direct speech whenever possible.


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