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If a product is good enough or it meets people's needs, advertising is unnecessary. Opinion essay

arthur123 1 / -  
Aug 12, 2022   #1

Ielts essay about advertising

If a product is good enough or it meets people's needs, people will buy it. Therefore, advertising is unnecessary and no more than an entertainment, what is your opinion?

Many people believe that a customer will purchase a product they see as compatible with their requirements, as a result, advertisement is redundant and just serves to entertain people. In my opinion, this idea is seriously flawed as I will explain further in this essay.

Firstly, advertising informs people of the various choices they have. Were it not for the promotions people often see, they would not know about other product that may serve them better than the one they are currently using. A housewife in Vietnam, for example, keeps buying a type of industrial fish source as she thinks that it does fine for her family. However, through the advertisement on television about a type of traditional fish source which is higher in quality, this woman can make a wiser choice to improve her family's daily meals. Thus, customers are given the chance to realize a better product that serves the same purpose.

Further, advertisement makes the market more competitive and the main beneficiaries of which are customers. One of the deciding factor in each purchase is the price and companies often compete in terms of this element. Usually, the main tool they use to propagate their competitively priced merchandise is advertisement; therefore, customers will benefit from this. If there is no advertisement, then, it is likely that there is no need for a company to make their product competitive as buyers are unaware of the prices their rivals offer.

In conclusion, the idea that advertising is worthless is seriously flawed. Maybe customers will find products they assume are good enough in any supermarket they visit; however, access to even higher-quality ones with better price options can only be provided through advertisement.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,210 4317  
Aug 12, 2022   #2
Good work on the prompt restatement. It is altered enough to pass as the original thought of the author. This will show the examiner that the comprehension skills of the writer extends to his ability to use enough English vocabulary to get a close enough version of the original across to the reader. The opinion presentation is also well presented but lacking the summarized supporting topic presentation at the end. The summarized topics being necessary to help further enhance the comprehension skills and task compliance score of the essay.

The writer kept on referring to "fish source" in the essay. That is incorrect as the reference is "fish sauce". A source is the beginning of something while a sauce is a flavor enhancer. He was referring to the latter meaning. A simple mistake? Yes, but one that will have a slight lowering effect on his vocabulary score.

When the writer wrote the reverse paraphrase in the conclusion, he kind of lost track of the discussion topic foundation. It is not that advertising is worthless. The reference was that advertising could be considered unnecessary since it is only used to entertain people. This incorrect restatement will affect the accuracy score of the task discussion.

All things considered though, the discussion paragraphs are strong, convincing, and cohesive enough. It is obvious that the writer has good control of his sentence development and punctuation usage, sections where others often fail in the test. The overall essay will not be severely affected by the scoring deductions that will be applied to some parts of the presentation. The word count is just enough to gain full or moderate scoring considerations based on sectional scoring requirements.
lexuanhoa123 5 / 12 7  
Aug 12, 2022   #3
I think that in this sentence "Many people (...), as a result, advertisement is...", you have used "as a result" wrongly. This sentence has two independent clauses so if you want to link these two independent clauses together, you must add "and" before "as a result". But if you don't want to use "and", you have no choice but to separate the first clause from the second clause with a dot. This means that instead of one long sentence, there will be two short sentences like this: "... requirements.As a result, advertisement is ... "

I hope this helps. Keep up your good work.
Nhat Ha 3 / 7  
Aug 15, 2022   #4
Yes, I also think you made a mistake about "fish source" instead of "fish sauce", which then causes the readers a little hard to understand.

When you use "firstly", then I think you will have "Secondly" or something but it didn't so you can use "To begin with..."
However, the way you elaborate your ideas is really understandable.
Keep working on your writing. Good luck.

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