The proportion of the most familiar merits and drawbacks of Fairmont Island based on a visitor survey is illustrated in the pie charts. Overall, it can be seen that the majority of visitors like the people of the island and dislike the expensive living cost there.
In detail, the inhabitants of Fairmont Island become the most popular reason to visit that island representing at two-fifths of all aspects. On the contrary, they mostly claim to dislike about the high rate of living expense at under a half. Subsequently, at 30%, the exquisite scenery becomes one of the major excuses to enjoy this place although less than a third of them state that they aren't pleased of the entertainment.
Moreover, the culture and good quality of lodging are chosen by minority of tourist as the attractive side of the isle at slightly more than one-in-ten for each category. In addition, a fifth of them said that they cannot get used to the weather in this island and a very small number of people who visit there do not have a great appetite for the food.
Maya, I would like to try to assess you based on writing band descriptors of IELTS task 1. Firstly, with regards to your task achievement, you were able to address the requirements of the task and the overview was also quite clear. Yet, the absence of clear stages made you only scored 6 in this part. Secondly, concerning coherence and cohesion, the information and ideas that you presented was coherent, but the usage of cohesive devices was over-use. You accidentally added cohesive devices for every sentence, and this was inappropriate. This dragged your score down to 5.
Thirdly, regarding to lexical resource, the range of vocabulary was adequately presented for the task, but I didn't notice the existence of less common vocabularies or some phrasal verbs in your essay. You were still using basic level of vocabulary, such as good, and small, which made you only got 6. Lastly, about grammatical range and accuracy, it was interesting, since most of your sentences were accurate. The thing that was so unfortunate and made you unable to reach band 7 in this part was because of the use of contraction.
Therefore, the overall score of this writing is between 5.5 and 6.0. However, don't worry, it was just a prediction from me. I hope you can do better for the next trial :)