Unanswered [11] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

Task 1 about the proportion of national buyer expenditure on selective categories in five nations

MinhGerman 1 / 1  
Jan 20, 2021   #1

percentage of national expenditure by category

The table illustrates about the proportion of national buyer expenditure on selective categories in five nations in 2002.

Overall, the highest percentage of spending nourishment or cigarette and studying including activities in 2002 was Turkey, whereas Italy's consumption spent the most percentage of clothes. In contrast, Sweden's expenditure accounted the least proportion of costume and foodstuff and Spain consisted the lowest rate of spending on education or studying activities.

Turkey was the country that had the highest percentages consisting of 32.14% and 4.35% by two items including foodstuff or tobacco and training, which doubled the percentage of expenditure in Ireland on both items as same as Turkey . Ireland were the second highest which accounted for 28.91% of nourishment or cigarette and Italy had the most significant proprtion of clothing at 9%.

On the other hand, it can be seen that Sweden and Spain had the lowest percentages on different categories. The proportions of national consumer expenditure in Sweden on food, drinks, tobacco and clothing or footwear were approximately 16% and 6%. Spain had slightly higher on these figures, but the lowest figure on leisure and education was nearly 2%.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,324 3356  
Jan 21, 2021   #2
You forgot to include the image so you cannot expect a thorough and appropriate review of your report presentation. I do not have any instructions or image to base the review of your work on. That said, I will do what I can to give you a general review of your work. As best as it can apply without the writing instructions.

The summary overview could have more information such as the categories you will be reviewing, which would help the reader develop a mental picture of the image the information is based on. You are missing a trending statement in the presentation. Your summary of information comparison is missing the 5th country. The comparison cannot be considered a trending statement as the trending statement indicates either a predominantly high or low measurement towards the end of the measurement image for one of the countries. There is no country in particular that needs to be presented, but the trend must be singular rather than comparative.
OP MinhGerman 1 / 1  
Jan 21, 2021   #3
Thank you for precious feedback for my writing Task 1 in IELTS. This is my first time that I have posted on EssayForum and I do not know how to add more image as jpg file so this is my major mistake, I am deeply appologized about that. I will receive your approriate feedback so that I can improve more for my writing. Regardless

Home / Writing Feedback / Task 1 about the proportion of national buyer expenditure on selective categories in five nations