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IELTS W. TASK 1: Proportion of vehicle registration in US between 1970-2010.


jhhh11 14 / 30  
Jun 29, 2020   #1
Hi everyone, I wrote this paragraph for IELTS Writing Task 1. I really appreciate any help/comment!

The graph below shoes changes in the share of vehicle registration of the three most common types of commercial vehicles in the US between 1970 and 2010.

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Word Count: 150
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The line graph reports the ratio of the means of transportation in the United States between 1970 and 2010. Overall, trucks occupied the majority of the transportation registration, followed by taxis, then buses. In 1970, almost 50% of the vehicle registered were trucks, while 25% were taxis, and buses took up above 5%. In 1980, however, taxis rose to the highest proportion since the number of trucks steeply declined; buses also had an increase and met its peak. From 1980 onwards, the number of trucks gradually increased, in contrast, were buses. Taxis had its trough in the year 2000 but soon rose strongly afterward. By 2010, compared to the starting points, taxis were the only mean of transportation that gained popularity in vehicle registration in the United States, while the other two both declined. In particular, the new proportions of trucks, taxis, and buses were 45%, 35%, and 3% respectively.




Holt [Contributor] - / 9,752 3084  
Jun 29, 2020   #3
While 150 is the minimum word requirement, the exam taker is expected to write between 175-190 words. That is because there is a 3 paragraph requirement for this report. The sentence requirement for each paragraph is between 3-5 sentences. Your essay is improperly formatted. The paragraphs should have been presented in the essay as follows:

Par. 1: Summary overview + trending statement
Par. 2: Data reporting
Par. 3: Comparison points

Since the essay is not properly formatted, I cannot accurately assess your work in terms of written requirements. You should know how to divide each paragraph based on the discussion instruction requirements. That is why the essay is short in terms of information presentation, information assessment, and comparison data. Each of those requirements should be seen in separate paragraph presentations.

I should be able to give you a better assessment of your data presentation skills when you post your next essay. I hope you will have that essay properly formatted so that a true assessment of your Task 1 abilities can be made.


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